What did the blond say when she got into a car crash? Nothing, she died.

Dad, they tell me I am a slowpoke at school, what can I do? ... Eh son, this is mommy, your dad died ten years ago remember?

This Anti-Joke Is Loading Plese Wait . . .

Once upon a time, The end.

A grasshopper hops into a bar. The bartender looks down at him and says "Hey, we have a drink named after you." the grasshopper looks up at the bartender...then proceeds to hop along because Grasshoppers can't communicate with humans. Then several of the bars patrons looked at the bartender, worried for his mental health.

What is a life without options.... an optionless life

what's funnier than hell? heaven

watch a i d s left

*Knock knock* Who's there? No one answers so the man opens the door and gets stabbed 7 times in the chest

Why did the chicken cross the road? When he first entered the world, Chicken was a lonely bird. Nobody else liked him. Not even his mother. He was small and scrawny, and whenever the farmer came to feed the pigs or shear the sheep, he would get scared and hide in between two pieces of wood. One day Chicken woke up and his family was gone. Although they had never loved him, his heart was tender, and he was desperately concerned for him. After hours of searching for them, he overheard Cow speaking to Horse: "It's a tragedy, really. They were such a happy family. But now their off to the land of KFC, forever lost in the sea of chicken wings. But Chicken was determined to change his family's fate. He escaped the barn and ran into the woods. There he traveled day by day, and at night he hid from the hungry wolves. Life in the forest was tough, but no tougher than the loss of loved ones, so he kept going. On and on and on, until the forest ended and the city began. It was a new world to Chicken. He had never seen so many different buildings and contraptions. His eyes had never before held the wonder of the majesty of such a strange place. After traveling through the dangerous alleys of the city, he finally found it: the terrible land of KFC. The place where humans' dreams begin, but chickens' end. The place of horror and death and unfairness. The place that summarized Chicken's whole life. He was here now. The only thing separating him from his family was a road. A road that was so small compared to his previous trials, so incomprehensibly tiny when placed Nextel to the gaping hole in his broken heart. So the chicken crossed the road. Then he got hit by a bus.

How Many Blondes does it take to open a fridge. 1 Because most blondes are smart and can open fridges.

Why did the chicken cross the road? To pick up the carcass of its road-killed younger brother and weep.

What did hitler say when he spilt coffee all over himself Ow I am burnt

Four surgeons are taking a coffee break: 1st surgeon says "Accountants are the best to operate on because when you open them up, everything inside is numbered." 2nd surgeon says "Nah, librarians are the best. Everything inside them is in alphabetical order." 3rd surgeon says "Try electricians, man! Everything inside them is color coded." 4th surgeon says "I prefer Chelsea fans. They're heartless, spineless, gutless and their heads and asses are interchangeable."

So I was making love to my cat the other day, and my pet dog comes in.

So there's this big ass moose, and he walks into this grocery store, & asks the cashier "which isle are the potatoes in?" the lady replies, "down isle 5." so the moose walks down to isle 5 and there weren't any potatoes!

What was the prostitute's favorite number? 68

What did god say when he made the first african american? "I got about 3 more humans to go and about 400,000,000 more insects and plants"..

Why does the gaming console Wii suck? ????????????????I like ice cream????????????????

An Asian man fails a math test

why was 6 afraid of 7? because he raped her

Whats scary about the asian man driving a car? He was blind

roses are red violets are blue I have five fingers and the middle one is for u

You just read this ..

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

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The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

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