well, I'm dying of AIDS, so....

What did the blue man say to the red lady? Do you want to make purple? -A.M.M

why is six afraid of seven? because seven is a jew!

Nature is filled with wondrous things. No really, this isn't a joke.

Why did Helen Keller's dog run away? It didn't. She was capable of loving and caring for a dog.

Why did the baby cross the road? A very uncaring parent left their infant outside. The unsupervised baby then crawled under the fence and began to head towards the road. When the baby began to cross the road, there were two cars coming from both directions. Luckily, they saw the baby and came to an abrupt stop. Unfortunately, when the baby made it to the other side, an eagle swooped down and snatched the baby, because it is a bird of prey. Fortunately, the child's life was spared by the eagle. The Department of Child Services showed up later only to confiscate the baby from the parents. The eagle wanted to adopt it, but it could not speak nor could it sign the legal documents because it was an eagle.

An Octopus walked into a bar. He then died as he had been out of his natural habitat for an exceedingly long period of time. An octopus can only survive on land for 30 minutes.

How do you make a momma bird not fly back to its nest? Burn it down!!

What did America get on the 11th September? 9/11

what did the elephant step on when he was running through the jungle? .... a coke machine.

poop nuff said

Knock knock. Who's there? Meals on wheels - eat up!

Where can you find a good lawyer? At a reputable law firm.

"Why did the chicken cross the road" "why" "to get to the gay guys house" "knock-knock" "who's there?" "The chicken..."

What's funnier than the Holocaust? The Holocaust is not an idea of the slightest humor at all. Millions of innocent civilians were slaughtered, millions more were sent to brutal concentration camps where they would fight for a crumb of food on the ground and get terribly punished for it, and live their whole lives in pain, torture, and starvation, millions more were sent to concentration camps then murdered, and millions of people, including children were left without family or anywhere to live. On top of that, their whole lives they were mistreated for their differences, and never got to live up to their dreams because of this horrifying event. It left the world in shock for years after, and scars of the event still live on in present-day families whose ancestors were harmed in the Holocaust. The terrible memory of it will never leave this Earth.

What did the kid with no arms and no legs get for Christmas? A bicycle

A baby seal walks into a club.

A boy walks into a bar. Because he was under-age, security kicked him out as soon as possible and alerted his parents.

What did the ant say when he walked in the club. . . Nothing he was immediately stepped on.

Those who can't teach... Aren't teachers.

A Chinese man, a Mexican man and an African man walk into an American bar. None of them know any English and can not order a drink. They walk out promptly, frustrated by the difficulties of living in a strange new world where they don't speak the native language.

Whats invisible and smells like carrots? Rabbit farts

Have you seen Stevie Wonders new house? Well neither has he.

Why was the young women crying Because her fiancé who was battling a severe Case of pneumonia just passed away

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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