What do you call a man with no legs? A cripple

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How did the blind man end up in the hospital? He didnt see the bus coming.

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Chuck Norris was once engaged by a woman for whom he had to fight a man to obtain all while doing a mundane activity in an unorthodox manner. He promptly declined for he is married and told the man he only fights for self-defense. He proceeded to put his pants on one leg at a time like everybody else.

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JAmie stegman loves making love with his sister... he loves inbreeds so much

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What do you call man who travels on foot? a pedestrian

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What made the lady dance? Bandz!

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My mom is such a bitch that no one will date her!!!! !!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!TRUE STORY!! :D

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What is blue and angry? Mr Johnston wearing his green dress. I'm colour blind but he came round to my way of thinking in the end.

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It is Scientifically proven that, if you have a shower in china... you get wet

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What's funnier than throwing a baby off a bridge? Everything, if you think that's funny, you're a terrible person.

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roses are red, violets are blue, i have AIDS, now so do you.

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What do you call a black man on the moon? An Afronaut

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Jenny tried out for the school play. She got a callback the next day. Her father had died.

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What is chewy and tastes like gum? Chewing gum.

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Why was the firefighter carrying a hot girl? Because her house was on fire.

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Whatever you do in life, give 100%… unless you’re giving blood.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? To get to the other side.

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Q: What would George Washington do if he were alive today? A: Scream and scratch at the top of his coffin.

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A man walks into a psychiatrists office with a banana in his ear. The psychiatrist says, why do you have that banana in your ear. The man says, "What?" The psychiatrist says, "I said, 'Why do you have that banana in your ear?" The man says, "What?" The psychiatrist shouts, "I SAID, WHY DO YOU HAVE THAT BANANA IN YOUR EAR?" The man says, "Sorry, I can't hear you, I'm deaf."

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What's orange and sounds like a parrot? An orange parrot.

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What did Jesus say to the giraffe? Good day to you sir.

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Roses are red Violets are blue Tulips are white Daisies are yellow Why am I naming flower colours?

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What did the doctor say to his patient with cancer? "You have cancer...".

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"My c.ock is bigger!" "No! My c.ock is bigger!": Two gamec.ock owners arguing over who has a bigger dick.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops