an englishman,scotsman,and irishman walk into a bar the englishman says " a pint of lager please" "that will be 10pounds , says the barman "Im not paying that , ill see you in court" says the englishman . The same thing happens , in turn to the scotsman, and irishman ,and a summons is issued. In court the jugde says "why are you charging drinks too dear?" the barman says "im not, im selling them to a englishman ,scotsman, and a irishman..

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What did Delaware? A coat.

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Autism speaks but not really

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What's worse than the Holocaust? People trying to be funny writing the same jokes over and over.

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what do you call a man who is addicted to alcohol... an alcoholic

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Justin Beiber walks into a bar. He is not served any alcohol because he is not yet 21.

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What's the difference between a white baby and a black baby? 10 minutes in the microwave.

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Mam: Wanna hear a joke about my penis?... nevermind, it's to long. Woman: wanna hear a joke about my vagina?... nevermind, u wouldn't get it.

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What did the guy and girl do at the wedding? Nothing, The guy is gay

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What do you call two men kissing? Gay.

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What is white black and Chinese A panda

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Why do women live longer? Once they're sexual and metabolistic hormones are moleculy different from men's, their metabolism is different and act on different organs and vice-versa. Therefore, they live longer. Still, in a worldwide average, more men born than women.

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There was a blonde, a brunette, and a redhead. They all had different colors of hair.

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What's the difference between an elephant and a moscito? There are several differencies. Firstly, the elephant is a mammal and the moscito is an insect.

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Why did the clown get in the car? Because he can.

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A man walks into a bar. He walks out 10 minutes later because he was satisfied with the new hooker he killed and made out with in the bar's bathroom.

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Roses are red, violets are blue, f*** you, f*** you.

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If you're riding on a jet ski and the wheels fall off, how many pancakes does it take to cover a car? Blue. Because Ice cream doesn't have any bones.

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A rapist is asked to teach a kindergarden class. The kids learn many things and have a great day.

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What does a nun and a hat have in common? Size

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What do you call a kid with no arms, no legs, and an eyepatch? Names.

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Why did the girl fall off the swing? She had no arms.

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What do 10 dead babies in a blender sound like? Idk because I was too busy masturbating.

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A black guy and a white guy jump out of a tree, who hits the ground first? They both hit at the same time while sustaining minor injuries.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops