A guy walks into a bar. He orders a drink and sighs heavily, waiting to escape the reality of his broken home, his cheating wife, and his high school dropout kid.

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A man is walking down the street when he stumbles upon a school, every school in the area had an American flag outside it, so he sees the flag and atop this flag a man is sitting and he doesn’t look comfortable. Next to the flag pole is a chair with a flag attached to it and the wind is as strong low down. So he looks at the man and says "Sir I think you may be using those wrong." The man on the flagpole says "why?" So he says well this chair is flat and made for sitting and this flag pole has a draw string for the flag. The man atop the flag pole says "I'm sure good will come of this…..im sure." the man says "What good could possibly come of this!" and the man on top of the flag pole looks at him and says "Later……………..you can tell this story to your friends and disappoint them when they find out theirs no punchline."

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Why did the man look in the mirror? To see his reflection.

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What did the farmer say to the cow on the roof? Get off the roof.

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Why did the plane crash? The pilot was a loaf of bread.

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Cool story bro. Tell it again.

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Two men walk into a bar. You would have thought one of them would have seen it.

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why was the giraffes head so far away from his body? because he has a long neck

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A potato walked into a bar and ordered a large bowl of french fries

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How did Barry Bonds break the career homerun record? A combination of natural ability, practice, and a plethora of performance enhancing drugs.

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What do you get if you cross a Kangaroo and a Sheep? They are too entirely different species and cannot be crossbred.

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whats purple and brown lucozade sport

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these jokes are not funny but there funny because there not funny aaaaaaaa pissing me off

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Why did Hayden Bryant walk down the street? Because he can, dont doubt Hayden Bryant.

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How many dead babies can fit in a dead horse 11

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Roses are Red Violets are Blue I got to go now Gonna take a poo.

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How much wood could the woodchuck chuck if a woodchuck could chuck wood? A relatively small amount compared to the amount of trees in the world.

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You know what isn't funny? Getting punched in the face. You know what is funny? Brittany Spears getting punched in the face.

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What did the kid say to the ginger? You're gay.

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Your mom is so fat, she suffers from heart disease, high blood pressure, and type 2 diabetes.

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Getting an STD. What's worse than mixing up the order of the joke and the punchline?

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A farmer was robbed and complained to the sheriff's department that he suspected it was a black man behind the crime. "How do you know this for sure?" The sheriff asked him. He replied, "I chased him into the night, it was dark and I couldn't see him"

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What do you call a cat at the bottom of the ocean? A cat.

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What is more worse than death? Death

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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