I SHOT SOMEBODY!!!! Said no stormtrooper ever.

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What did George W. Bush say to his wife when he got home? I'm home.

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Here's a joke for u Hahaha suck on it I wasnt going to make u laugh o yea ur mom died

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Why don't white people do the right thing? Because we suck

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How many eco-friendly people does it take to change a lightbulb? Nobody knows because fluorescent lightbulbs last 6 to 12 years longer than an incandescent lightbulb.

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A padawan walks into a bar. He is promptly ridiculed by his master for not minding his surroundings.

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A Pole walks into a bar and gets annexed by Germany.

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A priest, a rabbi, and a Buddhist monk walk into a bar. They discuss their differences over a pint of beer and leave with a greater understanding of each other's faiths.

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9/11/01 was a terrible day I got dirt on my suit when touring NY

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Why doesn't Santa come in the summer? Because it's not Christmas.

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PENIS THAT IS ALL!

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How did the ship-less pirate cross the Atlantic? In an airplane.

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whats purple with fur?nothing mammals cannot have purple fur

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Kid 1 "Man this is the hardest poop i've ever taken." Kid 2 "Maybe it's because you ate the Happy Meal toys." Kid 1 "You know what? I think you're right. Commotion ensues as the toilet bowl fills with blood as the action figure has cut the inside of his large intenstine. He is screaming in pain. Kid 2 reacts quickly getting him to the hospital just making it in time before Kid 1 passes out. Thankfully he survives but has to get shrgery. Meanwhile, the family dog Buster decides to drink the blood poop water from the bowl and dies from poisining.

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A 14 year old walks into a bar. The bartender yells "Hey, no minors allowed!" The 14 year old yells back "Excuse me? Do you see a fvcking pickaxe?"

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Why are asians so smart? Because they study very hard and learn the material.

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What is green and fuzzy and if it fell out of a tree it would kill you? A pool table.

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Why did the black man kill himself? Because he was black

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There once was a man from Nantucket.

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A white man asks a black man, "Did you fall into a chimney?" and laughs. The man proceeds to wash off his hands and face to reveal beautiful, dark-brown skin. Then they both joke about it because they are best friends.

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What's green and has wheels? Dave Matthew's Band

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What does Megatron say when a video game takes forever to load? "You have failed me yet again, Start Screen!"

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How is it you become the true badass you say? Its a very complicated process that takes decades of training, and many failed attempts on before you become the one, true badass on the entire planet. Once you had done it. People will love you forever, there would be parades, parties, celebrations, even a holiday, just for you and you alone. Too bad I'll never tell you.

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What's the longest, hardest thing on a black man? His femur.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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