what's worse than being attacked by a giant ant? being attacked by two giant ants

Knock Knock Who's there? I am I am who? I am here to see you

What did the man say when he saw an orange? That's not a banana.

Why did the man eat the cheese? because the man was a mouse

I told my wife she was like a fine wine She asked if it was because she improves with age. I told her yes All was well.

A duck walks passed a lemonade stand.

What do you call a man who eats another man? An man eater.

Yo Mama is so dumb, that she scored significantly below average on the SAT's.

Why did Billy start a fire? Because he was cold.

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Have you ever ate a donut? Yes I have. In fact, the donut I ate recently was fairly delicious.

Whats black, white, and red all over? A severely beaten and bruised man who was found un conscience and robbed in a dark parking lot behind Dennys at 2 o'clock in the morning.

FUCK THE JEWS

what did chloe say to alexis? you took my phone

What did the little boy with cancer say right before he died? Nothing. He was very sick, and could not speak during the last few weeks of his life.

kesha is a virgin.

whats worse than finding a worm in your apple getting blow jobed by a giant squirrel

A man went to the doctor with a strange complaint. "Well it's like this Doc, when I drive to work in the morning through the country lanes I start to sing 'The green green grass of home'. If I see a cat then it's 'What's new, pussy cat?'. It's so embarrassing, even when I'm asleep and dreaming, I still keep singing. Last night, it was 'Delilah', and my wife was not amused!" "Yes, it would apear that you have the early symptoms of Tom Jones syndrome." "Well I've never heard of that, is it common?" asked the man. "Yes," replied the doctor, "It is very uncommon."

Why was the human stronger than the dog? Because the dog had four legs and a mouth and a human has 2 legs, 2 arms, and is taller. Therefore, the human has more capabilites than the dog.

Why did Jimmy cross the road? Because a chicken was about to cross the road, and he wanted to be kind and help the old 72-aged chicken get across the road. Because Jimmy had a grandfather that passed away because he was too old and nobody helped him cross the road. Jimmy is haunted by that memory and doesn't want that to happen to anyone else. Especially a chicken.... Also there were no cars and his best friend chicken was on the other side waiting for him.

What would Walt Disney be if he were still alive today? Still anti-semetic

Bad grammers.

a black person was walking into his home. good thing balls like apple juice and Miley Cyrus was keeping guard with her sword.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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