You and your parents are going to die today

lybia

why did jimmy win the lottery? WAFFLE

whats bloody and mingen Scabbaz head

What's the difference between a Jew and a pizza? A pizza is a tasteful meal and a Jew is a person of Israeli decent.

Have you seen Stevie Wonders new house? No. Neither Has He.

Q: What's the difference between lucky charms and a baby? A: One is magically delicious and the other is a breakfast serial.

What's worse than finding a worm in your apple? This joke.

How did the little boy survive the massacre? He didn't. How did the little girl survive the massacre? She was the killer.

what is green, blue with spots all over? A frog with chicken pox

A middle aged bald man goes to Chuck E. Cheese with a hood and a lump in his back pocket. He has a somewhat enjoyable time with his offspring and leaves.

Why did the old woman fall down She got shot

Your mom is so fat, that she has unsightly stretch marks.

what happend to Helen Keller when she fell in a hole She climed out of the hole

Why didn't the chef serve the black guy his food? Because he wasn't a waitor.

What do you call a pile of dead children? Home

what starts with an f and ends with a uck? firetruck!!

why did the chicken cross the street? he couldn't, he lives in a rural area on a farm where there are no streets

Roses are red Violets are blue I'm a paranoid schizophrenic And so am I

Two giraffes walk into a bar, hit their heads, cracktheir skulls and die.

Why did the chicken cross the road? Hold on. Let me think of an answer.

i am iron man running over fat kids in my van

Yo momma is so fat, when she wears a bathing suit, people are like, wow, that woman is fat.

So a dog walks into a bar, and the bartender says, "Quickly, someone give me the number for animal control."

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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