If a tree falls in a neigheorohood lots of people hear it.

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Back in my day,we used to have Johnny Cash,Bob Hope and Steve Jobs. Now we have higher divorce rates.

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What's better than winning a gold medal at the Special Olympics? Not being retatrded

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Knock... Knock... Who's there? AIDS.

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how do you get a girl of a swing? puch her off! how do you get her friend of a swing? throw a refridgerator at her!

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Why is 6 scared of 7? Because 7 is right behind 7 and he's naked.

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Why did the grandmother lock her grandson in the closet? Because she didn't love him.

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What did the finger say to the thumb? I'm in glove with you.

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"Hey dude, wanna come with me??" "Sure! Where????" "To the gorcery store, I need to buy a couple of lemons."

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Do you know whats sad? Global Warming Do you know why the polar bears are dying? Aids

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How did superman always save the day? Because he was a fictional tv actor so he could do whatever he wanted to.

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What's worse than a dead baby? 2 dead babies

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Why doesn't a chicken wear pants? Because, there are no tailors in the area who make pants suitable for chickens to wear.

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Whats the difference between a hundred dead babies and a Ferrari? The Ferrari isn't in my garage.

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This one time at band camp music was played.

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While walking along the beach, a man stubs his toe on a half buried lamp. He picks it up, dusts it off, and a enormous Genie appears in front of him. "You have released me from my 10,000 year imprisonment. I will grant you 3 wishes to repay you." says the Genie. The man quickly uses his 1st wish for wealth and the 2nd for the love of a beautiful woman. Unable to think of a 3rd wish and seeing the sunken look on the Genie's face, he wished for the Genie's freedom. The Genie uses his unrestrained powers to kill the man, resurrect Hitler and enslave the human race.

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The scientists of Cambridge have finally developed a cure for feeling low! They have presented it in the style of a song. See if you can spot the hidden frequency wavelengths when you sing it out lout. They are what make you feel better. You've got to LOVE the world! Be a friend! And when You're down you've got to get up again! And when your blue, here's what you do. Just sing this happy tune! However if that fails, then you should consider getting professional help.

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A green-painted man walked into a bar and confused a blonde, bar-tending horse with a tale of rape in the holocaust involving an amputee child riding a fridge on a plane with a pig, a duck, a chicken, a lawyer and countless men of various ethnicities, religious faiths and sexual persuasions. Together, they changed a lightbulb, ate wormy apples and agreed upon the colour of roses and violets respectively.

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At the time my grandfather came round to visit, what was happening in Australia? A giant spider was giving birth.

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What do gay guys eat? Normal food like every other human being.

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What do you say when you see your tv floating at night? Drop it, nigga!!

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why did the chicken cross the road? it was making its way home after a long day of luckless job interviews

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Knock Knock! Who's there? Santa isn't real.

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Why was Jessica sad? She had just recently run over a few newborn puppies with her car.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops