how do you fit 100 jews in a mini ? two in the front, two in theback and 96 in the ash tray

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Q. What did the mom say to the boy scout? A. He wouldn't be a happy camper.

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Who killed the ears of every human being? -Rebecca Black

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What does a lonely man do on opposite day? I don't know. Why should we know what he does, that is both weird and illegal. Stalking is a serious crime and should not be used. We do not know what he does on normal days, thus we cannot come to a conclusion to this question. However, I do hypothesize that he must be social on this day because this is the opposite of lonely.

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What is the biggest lie in everyone's childhood? "School lunch food is actually good."

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Oh...okay, good.

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I scream, You scream, The police come, It's awkward.

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What do you do when you see a black man limping in your yard? You invite him inside, ask him what happened, and possibly call an ambulance if, God forbid, the situation is that serious.

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Why Johnny's parents threw out his broken bike? - ´Cause Johnny got hitted by a drunken driver and died last week, when he was cycling to school.

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What was the last thing Batman said to Robin before they got in the Batmobile Robin, get in the Batmobile.

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What do Abraham Lincoln and George Washington have in common? They both had beards, except for Washington.

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how did the ant die? i stepped on it

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Why didn't the Hispanic man get elected? Because his policies were unpopular.

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An Englishman, an Irishman and a Scotsman walk into a bar. They had several drinks, conversed animatedly, and heartily enjoyed themselves.

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Why did 16-year-old girl scream in the basement? She was being raped.

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Knock knock who is there ? i'm an orphaned, sir can you tell me why did you write who "is" instead of who's ?? because than i will have to use the (') key and its very far not to mention that i have to use the shift key do u want a pizza ? how much ? 50 cents ? get the hell out ? im not even in yet !

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Did you hear the joke about Hellen Keller? Neither did she.

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What did the broom say to the vacuum cleaner? "Your mom sucks."

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Whats worse than death? Living in Agonising pain for the rest of the life that happens to be reading this statement.

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What did the penis say to the other penis? What? Penis motherbucker

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THUMBS THIS DOWN AND I WILL KILL YOU! TOTAL PEOPLE DIED FROM THUMBING THIS DOWN: 147289347809237489

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why did the man scream? he stubbed his toe on a door

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What is worse than getting stung by a bee? Watching your mother getting raped by your sister.

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Look whos talking Matt Critchley

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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