what do you call two arabs flying a plane? a pilot and a co-pilot

What was the last song those aboard the Titanic sang? "Staying alive"

Why did the turkey cross the road? His friend, the chicken, had just been hit by a passing car.

What did the fridge say to the watermelon? Nothing.

Mama Bear and Papa Bear were in court getting a divorce and the judge offered Baby Bear a choice of which parent to live with. "Do you want to live with your mother?" the judge asks. "No! She beats me." answers the baby bear. "OK, then you can live with your father." says the judge. "No! He beats me too!" cries baby bear. So Baby Bear was placed in a foster home.

Q: What's the biggest lie ever? A: Saying you read the Terms of Service

What’s the difference between a frog and a duck? One is a frog and one is a duck.

What did the child with no arms and no legs get for Christmas? Cancer.

what do you call a man with no arms no legs cancer and down syndrome? you call him stephen because his name is stephen

Why did the rapist go to the girl's dorm? He wanted to apologise for his crimes, and brought them all a drink. It was spiked, he raped them

Why was the blonde fired from the M &M's factory? Her Masters degree in electrical engineering made her overqualified for the job she had.

What did the duck say to the flag? NOTHING DUCKS CANT SPEAK or flags

Why did the monkey fall out of the tree?? It got shot Why did the 2nd monkey fall out of the tree? It was stapled to the first monkey

Why was the man sleeping. He was tired

Hello.

What is something you would not normally find in a china cabinet? Japan

Where did Sheyanne go during the bombing...... Everywhere

What did the Protoss player say when he lost to a Terran player? I concede defeat. You simply have a greater mastery over the game than I.

One day a farmer was planting his crops. All of a sudden he was hit by the magic school bus.

how does stephen hawking get an erection? he turns off his pop-up blocker

A man is riding down the road on his horse, Sally. He happens to see a horse without a rider, but with two saddles. He finds this peculiar, continues into town, and has a fine day.

What did the skeleton say when he was horny? Nothing. Skeletons are not living and therefore cannot be horny.

I like my coffee like I like my women..... Without Hepatitis.

Knock knock. Who's there? Robert. Robert who? Robert Anderson.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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