What did the baby say to it's mother as it was being thrown in the trash bin? Nothing, it couldn't talk yet.

How to apply total justice 1: Kill all humans! Moral: "Why do I have to die while he gets to live? Nobody gets to live? Sounds fair and just to me!"

Q:Whats rhe best part about spinning a baby round and round Stopping it with a shovel

Why do gorillas have big nostrils? Have you seen the size of their fingers!?!?!

If you can't read this, you should think about optical enhancement surgery. If you can, however, you just wasted 5 seconds of your life doing so.

doctor doctor i have been having a sore head recently . doctor : have you hurt your head yes

An Admiral walks into Ackbar...

I have this friend named Rachel, so I call her Rachel.

What did Little Jojo get for Hanukah? Nothing he is Muslim.

Lol Nerochan, that was like totally awesome!

Whats the difference between a crucifixion and a circumcision? In crucifixion you throw out the whole Jew.

What do you call ugly? Dionne Dodds

Hey, I just met you And this is crazy, but GET IN THE VAN

Why did the chicken cross the road? The cognitive capacity of the chicken is significantly underdeveloped in comparison to humans; thus, comprehending a chicken's motives is impossible. Furthermore, interspecies communication is largely understudied - a mysterious division of science that may never be fully revealed. Therefore, one could safely theorize that no single human could breach this gap in communication differences (assuming chickens do, in fact, communicate) and in turn, could not understand the chicken's reasoning behind its choice to cross the road (excluding the possibility of psychic connections between chickens and humans [see 'Dog Whisperer' for a more clear explanation on interspecial psychic relations]) That being said, the only scientific and logical way one could understand the aforementioned question is through observation. For example, perhaps food was located on the other side of the road. However, this seems to pose a plethora of other questions: Why was the chicken near a road and not in a coop stocked with adequate food? Was this a wild chicken? Are there wild chickens? Do wild chickens often cross roads? Are wild chickens dangerous? If so, why hasn't there been warnings about dangerous, wild chickens crossing roads? The answer to these questions may never be discovered or explained.

so your skydiving in the ocean and one of you bedroom windows break. how many bloodstains does it take to paint a peice of bread covered in goat milk? the answer is D. 2731 books on cannabalism

knock knock. come in.

"Free to play" Play free "right now"

Roses are red, Violets are blue, Does this smell like chloroform to you?

How do you call a man in a wheelchair? Disabled.

Why did the chicken cross the road? To avoid the avoid the nuclear bomb at hiroshima

Wanna know something funny? Your face

Yo mamas so fat We are all concerned for her health

Is this your pen? I wanna go to school, bye!

What's the difference between liberals and communists? Nothing.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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