a man walks into a bar after a long day at work, and asks for a drink. he finishes, pays the bill and leaves a handsome tip for the bartender and heads home.

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Knock Knock whose there YOUR MOM

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2 brothers were arguing, both had anger problems to the point where one started war with the other. Boy1: I HATE YOU Boy2: MOM HATES YOU Boy1: ....Wait why? Boy2: YOU WERE AN ACCIDENT SHE TRIED TO SELL YOU TO A MEXICAN AND HE SAID THAT THING WAY TOO DAM UGLEH ITD BURN THE FACES OFF MY COWS.

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What did the teenage girl text her friend while driving? It doesn't matter, she's dead now. Don't text and drive.

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what did the man say to his dog? sex. -teagan doherty

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No, Trinidad.

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What's brown and has four wheels? Wood, I lied about the wheels.

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A man walks into a bar. He suffered concussions later that night.

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Friend's are like pinguins, they both die when you stab them in the heart.

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What's black and blue and afraid of sex The twelve year Old boy in my trunk

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why did the man beat his wife because he was mean

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1. Why did sally fall of the swing? -because she had no arms. 2.Knock Knock -Who's there? Not sally.

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Gay jokes arn't funny. "Come" on guys.

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Q: Why was the baby crying? A: I kicked it.

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How do you kill a blue elephant? Shoot it with a blue shotgun How do you kill a pink elephant? Hold it's nose and shoot it with a blue shotgun.

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What's funnier than throwing a baby off a bridge? Everything, if you think that's funny, you're a terrible person.

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Why did Sally fall off the swing? Because she had no arms Knock knock. Who's there? Not Sally.

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roses are red, violets are blue, i have AIDS, now so do you.

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What's worse than accidentally flooding your bathroom? A Tsunami

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An anorexic women walks into McDonalds

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Knock knock. ... ... *after waiting 30 seconds or so to no answer, the knocker concludes there is no one home and decides to go home to take his son to soccer practice and work on his taxes, and maybe call his mother to see how her foot surgery went* Who's there? Oh.. This is awkward, I forgot why I was here in the first place. I have to go. Bye.

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There were 3 children: Flower, Petal and Fridge. Flower asked, "Mum, why is my name Flower?" to which she replied "Because a flower was the first thing to fall on you when you were born." Petal asked, "Mum, why is my name Petal?" to which she replied "Because a petal was the first thing to fall on you when you were born." Fridge said, "Herp derp dur" to which Fridge's mother replied "Shut up, Fridge."

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A man walks into a bar. His alcohol dependency is killing is family.

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What's worse than finding a worm in your Holocaust? Oh, wait, I said it wrong...

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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