A baby tastes grapefruit juice for the first time. She is allergic and immediately begins convulsing and dies.

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Well, honestly I don't know how I feel about meeting you yet, or chatting with you, I never believed I would get to speak, or even less meet "The Nero", I mean as far as I know, nobody that ever worked alongside you ever has... ...By the way, the thing with the metal arm, well I don't have both arms, so yeah, story of my life. I am "Eliza" here too, its not coding, its just me sharing my real part of my life with our followers, and well, they do not make much sense out of it, but I get to share the tale about how Nero saved me, if not in person.

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When is homework not homework? When it is turned into the teacher.

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A man walks into a barn the n was not visible

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What's worse than seeing your grandma naked. nothing.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? To see if he could beat the oncoming car.

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What's the square root of 69? 8.306623862918075

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What do you call a gardener in Mexico? Un Jardinero.

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Whats the difference between an oven and a Jew? An oven is a manufactured and creates heat through the power of electricity or natural gas

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What do you call an art history major with a job? A gainfully employed member of society, who assuredly benefited from his access to higher education. It is also possible that he was chosen for the position because of acquaintances or family members who were also employed by the company, but many people would consider it impolite to bring up this possibility, as it might be construed as denigrating the aforementioned individual or his chosen field of study.

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when I shaved this morning....... hairs went down the sink

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Why was the cancer patient in the hospital? Her mother threw a rock at her head.

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boobs

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Roses are red. Violets are blue. I am colourblind so screw you!

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A woman comes to the doctor with a dog and the doctor says: -What are you doing here, dog? Get the hell out of here, you're an animal.

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A woman walks into a sex sop, she buys a dildo.

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How do you keep a blonde busy? The best way to keep somebody busy is to make sure they have something to do, like get a job or a hobby or do some chores. The color of their hair is irrelevant.

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What's big, wet and hairy? Not what you think it is.

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whats funny with two wheels? A kid falling off his bike

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What's the difference between a badger and a TV? Alot.

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Knock knock Who's there? The police. Your husband has been killed in an accident.

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A: Ask me if I'm a truck. B: Are you a truck? A: No.

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Why was 6 afraid of 7? Because 7 was a registered sex offender

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How do you make a baby cry? Break its legs.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops