Q: What's the difference between a Chicken and a Triceratops? A: One is a Chicken and One is a Triceratops.

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Have you seen Stevie Wonders new house? No. Neither has he.

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What's 21 and pregnant? Ariana Grande

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A man walks in on his wife blowing Bubbles. Two weeks later they are divorced.

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What does a eagle and a bunny have in common.. nothing they're two different animals.

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Whats the difference between a truck full of dead babies and a truck full of bowling balls? You can't pick up the bowling balls with a pitchfork.

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Q: What did the man say when he tried to commit suicide by jumping off a 20 storie building? A: Ow!

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Reminds me of when I was a teen, I was working at an elderly home, and there was this really really old woman, and she was leaning forward towards me on her wheelchair, one of her hands accidentally near my crotch, I mean this granny was really senile and shit. Then she went all like, you really like it when I touch you there don't you? I mean it was not the best nor the fastest one, but all that excitement "OMG WHAT IF I GET CAUGHT BY A COLLEAGUE WHILE A 89 YEAR OLD WAS JACKING ME OFF!" Really made it all special folks... Especially when I got caught, it was like OMG STRESS ORGASM HOLY DONT CUM NOOOAAAARGHHHH!!!!!! WOHOOOOOO! I walked outta there like a champ, I was like 18 and my girlfriend/colleague which caught me was like, 27, and the next week she was 32, and before you know it, she was 46 on facebook... Thats like you know... Too old or something...

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Bill: My vagina is itchy. Tom: You don't have a vagina. It was later found out that bill had a sex change and did have an itchy vagina, due to an STI. He later died of cancer.

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A dyslexic man walks into a saloon and asks for a hair cut.

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You know what's really funny? Cancer What's funnier than that? The Holocaust Even funnier? Charlie Sheen

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What is the best way to put out a fire? Stop, drop and have an 0rgy.

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What's the difference between a vegetable and my son? Nothing

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whats the difference between a black guy, spook and a porch monkey? they are all stupid, stinky, n-i-g-g-e-r-s!

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There's a fine line between hyphenated words

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You know what they called Obama in highschool? Nigge*

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British Dentistry

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Why do leprechauns laugh when they run through the grass? Because it tickles their nuts.

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What does Chuck Noris have under his beard? A chin

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Friends are a lot like trees... ...they fall down when you hit them multiple times with an axe.

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Why was patrick sad? he was raped then murdered then super raped

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What did the woman do when her husband told her to make him a sandwich? She made him a sandwich promptly.

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Why did Bob wear a jumper and trousers even though it was a very hot day? Because he is an idiot.

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why did the one armed, bearded man, in a wheelchair go to the mall ? He wished to purchase yogurt and Tiger woods 2007 for the ps2

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops