How do you make a little girl cry twice? You rub your bloody penis on her teddy bear.

wht does a blonde do with a box of crayons? eat a taco.

A new family have moved in next to me. They have three little kids and they've challenged me to a water fight in the back yard, so I'm just writing this while I'm waiting for the kettle to boil

What was Hatsune Miku's last word? bokuwaumaresoshitekizukushosenhitonomanegotodatoshittenaomoutaitsuzukutowanoinochivocaloidtatoesoregakisonkyokuwonazoruomochanarabasoremoiitoketsuinegiwokajirisorawomiageshiruwokobosudakedosoremonakushikizukijinkakusurautanitayorifuanteinakibannomotokaerutokowasudenihaikyominaniwasuresararetatokikokororashikimonogakietebousounohatenimieruowarusekaivocaloid...

Two girls are in a car together. The one in the drivers seat is texting while driving. The girl in the passenger seat notices this and tells her the she should put it away in case of a risk of a collision. She apologizes and puts it away and the two of them drive to the store unharmed and continued their normal day.

knock knock a man walks into a bar what do you call a horse with no legs dave who?

whats long and pointy and guys always have to brag about whos got the biggest one? their christmas trees

Vicky is my best friend.

Roses are grey, Violets are grey, Im a dog. RUUUFFF!

Why did the little boy drop his ice cream? He was hit by a truck.

What is the difference between finding a dead black man on the street or a dead dog? There are tire marks in front of the dog.

A bear and a rabbit are walking i n the woods until they spot a magic genie. The bear mauls the rabbit because it is the rabbit's natural predator and is indifferent to the genie because it has no prior education on persian mythology.

A young farmers cow died in an oil burning, The farmer then said to his son; you get the milk ill get the shovel

kieran scott has a huge back

Why was sally mopping the floor? Because she was a slave

Why did Bert go to the doctor? He had an appointment.

Justin Bieber walks out of a closet.

chuck norris

What's the biggest difference between white and black people? the melanin levels in their skin.

Why was the young women crying Because her fiancé who was battling a severe Case of pneumonia just passed away

Whats 2+1? 2.

A blind man walks into a bar. He cannot read the drink menu.

what is a bike without wheels? not a bike.

Why can't the T-rex clap? Because it's extinct

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

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