Why did Daphie die? I stabbed her 487 times.

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A black man walks into a bar The bartender tells him they don't serves blacks The black mans calls the Police and the bartender is arrested for Discrimination

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A black guy, a priest, and a rabbi all walk into a bar. They order water and chat about life.

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What did the tuna say to the fan I LIKE YOUR STOOL AHAHHAHAHHAHAH

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What did the dog say to the house? Roof

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What do you call a black man and a black woman having sex? A husband and wife who love each other very much and are trying to have a baby.

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What does the cookie monster and the blue man group have in common? They are both homosexually active

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Hey I just met you, and this seems crazy. I have Alzheimers... Hey i just met you.

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why did corey cross the road? the green man flashed.

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Whats worse than finding a worm in your apple? A bug in your nut.

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What is brown and sticky? Syrup.

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Your mom is so stupid she makes stupid people look not stupid.

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knock knock! who's there? a fat salesperson here to deliver your supplements

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What is the answer to the question of life? Over 9000

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Alex Gedrose.

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What is the last digit of Pi? Pi is an infinite decimal sequence, and therefore has no last number, but if it did, it would presumably be somewhere from 0-9.

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Your momma is so dumb she has to have weekly tutoring to help understand finding the value of x in an equation.

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There once was a man who couldn't finish any sente

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"Lady's and Gentlemen, hobos and trams Cross side mosquitoes and bald legged ants Pull up a chair and sit on the floor and I'll tell you I've never heard before Of one bright day in the middle of night Two dead boys got up to fight Back to Back they faced each other Drew their swords and shot each other A deaf policeman heard the noise Came and killed the two dead boys If you don't believe this lie is true Ask the blind man he saw it too"

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Why did the gambler sell his house? Because he needed money to pay for male hookers.

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There were two muffins in an oven. They were forgotten about by the baker so they cried, caught fire, burned to death, and formed a medium-sized pile of ashes.

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What do you call a guy with a car on his head? Immediate identification would not be possible. The man would be referred to by his estimated demographics. Circumstantial evidence and dental reports may be required for identification at which points the family's would be notified. Only after this will the man's name would be released to the media who would in turn report this.

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Knock Knock. Who's there? Steve. Steve who? Steve Johnson, and I'm legally obligated to inform you that I'm a sex offender.

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One day, a small bald man was walking up the street, when her saw a large red porche, extremely grand, and the door was wide open. He walked over and inspected the open door, and to his surprise, the keys were in place by the steering wheel. He was a good man, with a loving wife and two teenage children, and he had no intention of steeling the vehicle. But astonished by the owner lack of protection, he hopped into the car and drove it around the block, just for the thrill of riding such an amazing car. Around 30 seconds after, he parked the car, got out, leaving the car in the same place, with the door open and the keys in, then he walked home and lived the rest of his life.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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