Knock Knock. Who'se there? It's Dave. Dave who? Um, you invited me over here. Open the damn door.

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why did the plane crash the pilot was a loaf of bread

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The blondes on the opposite part of the lake is a pretty good joke

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What do you get when you mix carbonated water, caramel color, aspartame, phosporic acid, potassium benzoate, caffeine, citric acid, and natural flavor? Diet Pepsi

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Quick ladies take off all your clothes the cloth stealer is coming Oh yyyaaaa

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why did the man hit the flight attendant? Im just kidding he didnt.

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a retard walks into a bar a bruise appeared on his head

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What's worse then breaking your xbox? Going on a 24 kill streak and having itchy balls.

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When Miley Cyrus sticks out her tongue, people usually are there to take a photograph.

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I was trying to think of a joke to write, but then I became unsatisfied with my creativity and began to spiral into a depressing tangent of thoughts. I just took 37 Ambien, and have approximately ten minutes to live. Instead, I will spend my last moments writing goodbye messages to friends on Facebook and longingly looking at images of the past. Goodbye, world.

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What the difference between Adolf Hitler and Michael Phelps? Micheal Phelps can finish a race.

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A cowboy rides into town and stays the weekend but then leaves on Wednesday, how is this possible? He was alive for the weekend and died on Sunday, his body left on Wednesday. Now get a job and be happy with your life.

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Whats green, has 4 legs and falls out a tree? A pool table

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Why did the chicken cross the road? Because it was playing Pokemon Go.

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A man took a police officers gun and threw it at a baby in a stroller. He went to jail.

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Justin Bieber's mother.

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Why did the chicken commit suicide? To get to the other side

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? The person who made that "joke" down there has no life ?

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A schizophrenic walks into a bar. He has dual personalities and does not realize that he has murdered his family.

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Q: whats big gray and cant swim A: a castle

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What are the two things that the little boy with cancer wants for Christmas? He wants his cancer to go away. He also wants the new Halo game.

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Who did the man call when his house was on fire? He called his mother as the firefighters put out the fire.

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Q:Why did the man have a lot of Hoes? A: He was an experienced Agriculturalist.

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How many babies does it take to paint a wall? It depends on how hard you throw them.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops