Why did the chicken cross the road? It didn't, most chickens are held on farms, but those that do roam free are afraid of automobiles so therefore they wouldn't go near a road at all. But if the chicken was located in a deserted town there would be no traffic, so then it would be able to cross freely over any road there and not get injured or mortally wounded.

thumb_up thumb_down -16

A skeleton walks into a bar and orders a beer and mop. In turns out the bartender was a paranoid schizophrenic and was hallucinating.

thumb_up thumb_down -16

Wanna hear a joke..... Corey Jacobs Penis!

thumb_up thumb_down -16

Lets just say that we are beyond the stage where I am "just" trying, by the way, you might want to search that last comment for double negatives. Or you know NOT NOT. Do not take my word for it, but if I am not wrong, the bacteria (yogurt) leaves afterwards, so you are eating milk that has been eaten and then.. You know... A common "side effect" of hypnosis, is that when it is used, the one hypnotized (both in this case) end up feeling a "strange" case of closeness, stronger bonds, friendship etc, scientists wonder why... ITS LIKE DUH! WE BOTH REVEAL DEEP SECRETS TO EACH OTHER! THINGS WE DO NOT EVEN USUALLY TELL OURSELVES! Its a literal no brainer, scientits can go fuck themselves, because as far as I know, thats the only fuck they ever get.

thumb_up thumb_down -16

What did the blind man say to his best friend? All i see is darkness and i want to end my life

thumb_up thumb_down -16

Why did the chicken cross the road? Because it was playing Pokemon Go.

thumb_up thumb_down -16

what is the difference between oral and anal? anal makes your day and anal makes your whole weak

thumb_up thumb_down -16

9/11

thumb_up thumb_down -16

Yo momma is so fat when she sat on the i pod she made the i pad!

thumb_up thumb_down -16

What does 2 + 2 equal? 4

thumb_up thumb_down -16

you and your family will die tonight

thumb_up thumb_down -16

"Is the Pope a Catholic?" Yes.

thumb_up thumb_down -16

I have Alzheimer's, i pee out gold, racoons

thumb_up thumb_down -16

What's a fat chinaman? A guy who somehow got obese on rice. HOW DOES THAT HAPPEN?!

thumb_up thumb_down -18

Roses are red Violets are blue This is a poem The End

thumb_up thumb_down -18

What's worse than rape? Gang rape.

thumb_up thumb_down -18

What's better than winning $5000 a week for life?! Winning any larger sum of money a week for life, and sex.

thumb_up thumb_down -18

What's more fun than a negative pregnancy test? Nothing.

thumb_up thumb_down -18

Two men walk into a bar. They get drunk.

thumb_up thumb_down -18

How do you wake up a black man? Punch him in the face.

thumb_up thumb_down -18

There once was a man from Peru, Who dreamed he was eating his shoe. He woke with a fright in the middle of the night and realized that his house was being robbed.

thumb_up thumb_down -18

How do you fit an elephant inside your car?: Starve it to death, then chop it in pieces.

thumb_up thumb_down -18

What did the "gangster" looking black guy ask the white guy he approached randomly on the street? "Excuse me sir, are you aware of the injustices done toward the jewish community that has been the decline of western society since the reclamation proclamation?"

thumb_up thumb_down -18

How did Chinese people get their names? They throw their pots and pans down the stairs. It says, "CHING CHANG CHONG!!!"

thumb_up thumb_down -18

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops