One day, a mother was speaking with her daughters. "Mommy," the first one said, "Why did you name me Daisy?" "Because when we brought you home, a daisy petal fell on your head." "Mommy," the second daughter said, "Why did you name me Rose?" ""Because when we brought you home, a rose petal fell on your head." "MMMBWWAAAAGGGH!" the last daughter cried. She was born with severe special needs and is incapable of coherent speech.

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Why did the farmer's wife leave the farm? Because she was a lesbian.

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Q: Have you heard from that guy who dropped a piano on his head? A: No one has, he dropped a piano on his head.

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Knock knock Who's there? I Love You! -Harrison

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How do you kill a blonde? Cut off the bloodflow to their vital organs.

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What did one Stoner say to the other? "I'm hungry, let's order pizza."

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what do you call cheese that's not yours? cheese that you stole.

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Roses are blue Violets are red What happened to the gay man? He listened to Justin Beiber And then was straight

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I can count to potato.

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why did the disabled man go to the shops? because he wanted a radiator panel

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What did the Nazi put into the oven? Bread.

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Why where the 3 little children talking about muffins? Because muffins are smart.

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Im thinking of a very long word..... L O N G

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why did the chicken cross the road? because it wanted to get to the other side! why did the chipmunk cross the road? because it was stapled to the chicken

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Yo' Momma is so fat she weighs a lot!

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Miranda Cosgrove's singing career. ......Thats it. Thats the joke.

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GIRL: Honey, for a holiday we should go someplace nice BOY: How will that work, none of us speak Mexican...

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Your mother is so fat that when she jumps into a pool, she displaces a proportionately larger amount of water than people with normal body mass indexes or BMI

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,try this on a girl, say "can I pop your cherry.........soda bottle cap off your cherry soda bottle?"

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your mothers so silly she saw a rock and sat on a chair.......?

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What do you call a doctor whos black A doctor

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How many feminists does it take to change a light bulb? Trick question; feminists can't change anything.

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roses are red, violets are blue, apparently you are blind or else I wouldn't be telling this to you.

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Why did the monkey fall off the tree? It died.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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