How many dead babies can you fit in a trunk? 37.

Susie sells seashells by the seashore. Susie was a schizophrenic bitch who caused irreversible harm to her family and those close to her. She also had underage sex with a black guy named John. He was actually a pretty decent guy, but he decided to smoke weed a couple times when his dad was going through some tough times. His dad resented him for this fact and it caused unresolved tension between them for years. This caused John to go out and seek younger girls to have sex with, to fill the emptiness he and his dad's relationship left him with. Meanwhile, Susie was falling in love with John, not knowing his many dark secrets he had tried best to keep hidden from her. Eventually, all of these things come out in the open, and Susie still respects him and ultimately loves him even more for being so honest.

Men's Rights

What did the smoker get for christmas? A bike.

A man is being followed by a large swarm of mosquitoes. He eradicates them by spraying himself with an insect repellent that has a high deet concentration.

What do you get when you mix a racoon and a human. A Smoothie

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HEY are you aware of how tired your suitcase is? Sorry, I rest my case.

Q: Why were the two elephants kicked off the beach? A: They were both level 4 sex offenders.

What did the robot say to the centipede? Stop being a centipede.

What's green and falls fom a tree? A dump truck. I lied about it being green.

What's the difference between a Jew and a Scout? The Scout gets to come home from camp.

Why did the car slam its brakes on? There was a infant under the bonnet.

3 jews walk into a bar I lied it was a gas chamber

what do you call a black guy who flies planes? a pilot

What do the pope and an orange have in common? They're both fruits. Except for the pope.

On a plane directed to Buffalo there are: an italian, a french and a greek. They all go there for tourism

9/11/01 was a terrible day I got dirt on my suit when touring NY

Your mama is so fat that when she walks her legs rub against each other

Are you a tree? No.

Haiku's are three lines long. This isn't a haiku.

Why did the boy have no friends? Because he was autistic.

Why did the man complain of pain in his ankle? Because several consecutive tissue samples of the area revealed a rapidly metastasizing neoplasm. Blood samples indicated the presence of what appeared to be Hodgkins Lymphoma. The man was very wealthy, however, and had world class doctors treat him. He then donated a vast portion of his wealth to research.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

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