Why did the paraplegic roll his wheelchair up a steep hill? Because he's crippled.

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Why did the monkey fall out of the tree? Because it was dead.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? Because it wanted to.

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QUIT PUSHING DAD GUMMIT!!!

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One day a man runs into a bar. He is already drunk and jumps through the window. This is illeagal, so he was arrested, stoned and killed.

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Q: A football coach walks into a bank. Why? A: Because one of his players is suffering from terminal cancer and he needs governmental funding for the team to play the big game against their rivals and to win, in hopes the kid will recover. Q: Why did the football coach go into the bank again? A: To receive more money to find a new running back.

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What do you call a kid with no arms, no legs, and an eyepatch? Names.

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Dylan F fell off a bridge Landed in some water and was ok 2 days later he got bit by a shark He is now in a coma

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You know what's catchy? A cold

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What's black and crawls around on eight legs? An octopus that just inked itself.

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So there are two kids in bumper cars at the local fair. A nuke was set off underground and most of the metropolitan was annihilated.

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How do you get black children to stop jumping on the bed? Tell them it's not allowed and that consequences will ensue if the rules are not followed.

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Q: Why are asians good at math? A: Because they study with their tutor every tuesday

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Donald Trump

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What did the guy and girl do at the wedding? Nothing, The guy is gay

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What did the little girl do with her puppy? She killed it.

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What happened when the chicken crossed the road? I got feathers stuck in my cars grill

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Why cant you see black people when you are playing hide and seek? Because they are in a very good hiding spot

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What did my grandma tell me during a funeral? Nothing. It's her funeral. She's dead.

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boobs.

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Two guys are on a bridge. One commits suicide, the other one is called John.

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What do you call love at first sight? A broken heart.

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Q: Why did the kid drop his icecream cone? A: Because he couldn't hold it he lost his arms in a car accident.

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A man walks up to an attractive woman and asks "Is it hot in here, or is it just you?" The woman replies "No, it's hot in here. It is a record breaking 114 degrees outside, which means everybody is using their air conditioner. Due to the large amount of energy air condioners require, the power has gone out in this building and the air conditioner is not functional. The tempurature in the building is 103 degrees and three children are in the emergency room because of heat stroke."

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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