What happens if you fight Chuck Norris? You might lose or win.

What's black and hangs from trees? tires ...and black people

I grew up, if we cannot live for ourselves, we cannot live for others, remember how people admired us when in their presence, while mocking us behind our backs, most humans do nor respect those that do not rule with lies, false promises, all backed up by an army no amount of civilians can defeat. We lost because people got what they wanted, preferring false promises from all ranging from their Gods, to their politicians speaking about their Gods, promises of betterment as a result of war in the name of Gods, but we are not that people. The problem is, that I used to believe that all of humanity possessed the potential people you and I have, and realize now that when I began looking down at people, I began looking down at myself, considering us all equal to them. Red, we might be few, but we are worth far more than those we consider our equals, maybe it is time even we, sought to rule those that desire to be ruled, rather than to help them find their desired path, because their desired path, might always have been to be ruled.

Whats blue and fuzzy? blue fuzz.

Why was the cancer patient in the hospital? Her mother threw a rock at her head.

What's broken to the side of the road and covered in cookie crumbs? A girlscout that got hit by a car.

Sonic

Bryce Harlan and I are close friends Love, Pete K

A man walks into a bar. He sees his wife with another man. That man is his brother.

Knock knock Who's there doorbell Doorbell who Doorbells can't knock

What's the difference between a duck and a goose? They're two completely different water fowl.

A penguin is driving through Arizona when his car's oil pressure light comes on. He drops his car off with a mechanic who says he'll get to it soon, and to come back in an hour. The penguin leaves the garage and, seeing a Baskin-Robbins across the street, stops in and orders a dish of ice cream. As he eats the ice cream he reflects on the series of extraordinary events that led him to this place, this time, this situation.

What would you if I slapped you in the face with a fish? Unless you are a push-over, it is likely that you would retaliate with anger.

Why did Billy fall off the swings? Because he had no arms. Knock knock! Who's there? Not Billy.

What's red and invisible? No Tomatoes

Why did the chicken cross the road? Why not

What makes Stephen Hawking such a lame scientist??? A: he has a disabling disease. It's called ALS.

An irish man calls a black man a nigger. The offended black man then proceeds to ravenously beat the Irish man's head into a nearby curb.

What happened when the dinosaur walked out into the rain? He got wet.

Knock knock Who's there? I'm the Dick I'm the dick who? I'm the Dick Cheney

why does renee suk at tetris? i dont know thats why im asking

What's the square root of 69? 8.306623862918075

Do you know what does Wikipedia says about Elton John ? It says that Sir Elton Hercules John, CBE (born Reginald Kenneth Dwight; 25 March 1947) is an English singer-songwriter, composer and pianist. He has worked with his songwriting partner Bernie Taupin since 1967; they have collaborated on more than 30 albums to date.

How many Jews can you fit in a car? Comfortably, four.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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