What's the difference between a pizza and a jew? A pizza doesn't scream when you put it in the oven

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The Arrowtongue commands the road like a semi-truck. But the Gyrosprinter corners on a dime.

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Why was the picture ruined? Because you were in it.

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What do you give a sick bird? First-Aid tweetment.

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Why did the feminist cross the road? To suck a penis

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What did the robot say to the centipede? Stop being a centipede.

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How many worms dose it take to eat an apple? One.

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What did I write on this website? This antijoke.

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Why did Sally fall off the swing? -- Because she had no arms Why did sally drop her ice cream? -- Because she got ran over by the ice cream truck

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Roses are red, Violets are blue, I have a gun, Get in the van.

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Knock Knock. Who's there? James. James who? James from work. Oh, come on in.

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What did the farmer say when he lost his tractor? I lost my tractor!

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Why didn't Valerie go on over to Amy's house? Because she's dead.

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Advice from a pro: Don't be a faggot

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Knock Knock? Who's there? The police The police who? I'm sorry mam but your husband is dead.

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Why did the bird fall out of the tree?" "Because it was dead?" "No. Becaus it was stapled to the squirrel.

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What's red and invisible? No Tomatoes

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A padawan walks into a bar. He is promptly ridiculed by his master for not minding his surroundings.

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When life gives you Corn Nuts, snack on them while watching your favorite TV show. Then go to sleep early and have a nice, peaceful rest, dreaming about the fun things you'll do tomorrow.

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What happened the magic tractor? It turned into the feild!

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Simon says; "You're adopted."

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Why does steve wonder always smile? He doesn't know he's black

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How many licks does it take for a pedophile to get to the center of a Tootsie Pop? Given a simple random sample of pedophiles, they will most likely have the same statistical standard normal distribution of tongue sizes and saliva efficacy as any other part of the population. Therefore, that question in regards to the tongues of pedophiles is irrelevant and remains unanswered.

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whats first than finding a worm in your apple? a blonde who asks you why there is a worm in your apple

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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