What player wears number 8 and plays for liverpool? Steven Gerrard

How do you make a plumber cry? Tell him that Luigi beat him to the princess

I like my kids how i like my coffee I dont like coffee

Why did the boy drop his ice-cream? It fell.

hey i just met you and this is c r a z y , but im a pirate so call me matey ;)

What do you call a man with a shovel through his head? Unless he was carrying ID when he died; John Doe.

Roses are red. Violets blue i do fuck people. MAYBE u too?

What do you call a blank white sheet of paper? Printer paper most likely

Why did the chicken cross the road? Why the f*** do so many people ask this question?

What did the foot say to the other foot? Nothing, because they are feet.

Why did the man cry when he was surrounded by black men? He got a call saying his mother had just died.

Not at all Nero, if humanity itself where better, you would never have had that pain you rather than carry seems to be stuck to you, what you call your armor, sounds more like a cage to me, it is no wonder that you lose faith in those that drag you down while you find peace and hope within yourself by helping them. I believe you got every right to lose hope in humanity at times, in my eyes you have always been much greater than them, you just seem to believe that if you fail at helping others, then you have failed yourself, remember that there are too many people that surrender in this world, that do not want to be helped back on their own feet rather than to be "shown the only way", you said it yourself, monkey see, monkey do is easy, too easy, and you never take the easy way. I am sorry if I copy your methods too much, it might seem to others as if you are chatting with yourself, which is just crazy, insane. silly, lets just say again that you just got a admirer in me, it cant be helped. Does this bother you?

What can u see in the dark that u can't see in the light? Absolutely nothing

Why did the chicken cross the road? It felt like it, no particular reason. Why did the hippo cross the road? Same reason as the chicken. Why did the Fred cross the road? He was with animal control, and a chicken and hippo had just been reported to cross this dangerous stretch of highway.

What does Pontiac stand for? Nothing. Pontiac's were discontinued

HAHAHAHAH Shut up Andra no one likes you

A Priest, Rabbi, and a Minister walk into a bar... i forgot the rest of the joke, but your mothers a whore!

what's funnier then 33? actually there's a plenty of things, just have to think about it

What has a mouth but cant talk Helen keller What has eyes but cant see Helen keller What has ears but cant hear You guessed it an ear of corn

What did the homeless man get for Christmas? HIV

Why did moral man run out of morals? Moral: LEAVE MORAL MAN ALONE! BUAHAHAHA LEAVE HIM ALONE! BUAAAAAAAAHAHAHA!

How many dead babies does it take to paint a house? Depends how hard you throw them.

what is red and lies on the floor? the boy that jumped out of the plane

Why did the chicken cross the road? It was feeling suicidal due to an existential crisis.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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