Your mommas so fat, that she's really big.

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Why can't black people swim? Cause poop don't float!

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Whats the greatest part of buttsex the refrigerators

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whats worse than finding a worm in your apple? not finding a worm in your apple, i quite like them actualy

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Why are there so many jokes about germans on Anti-Joke? Because the Germans epitomize the flavour of anti-jokes perfectly and they have the whole nazi history thing going on which is ripe ground for many an anti-joke

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Two muffins are sitting in an oven, they get burned because the oven was left on for to long and they end up being thrown away.

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How do you keep an elephant from charging? Shoot it with a high powered gun right between the eyes.

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How do you stop a vehicle moving at high speeds? Apply the brakes in a reasonable fashion.

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Add William Wright on facebook Answer-www.facebook.com/public/William-Wright

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Roses are red, violets are blue, f*** you, f*** you.

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you know what ice cream's made out of, right? milk.

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what did the blonde mail to her boyfriend? nothing, blonde's can't write.

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can people thumb up the evil dead statment below please... its important to me. (and the cup joke below) thanks people , ur great.

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Listen pretty lady, NO WHAT WE HAVE BEEN DOING FOR LIKE SIXTEEN HOURS OR SOMETHING NON STOP STRAIGHT, IS VERBOTEN! Honestly, for me its a bit of a requirement, sure girls can go all like "But you are like friendzoned to me now", but then I... Hmm, you know, not a womanizer,my wife has the right word for it, I am a seducer.... Suddenly I do not like the sound of that, actually Its not a bit of a requirement, it is TOTALLY a requirement. Say, does it bother you when I mention my wife like at randomness?

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What's brown and sticky? The faeces of a glue stick.

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Your mom is so fat, every time she swims in the ocean, north america sinks because of the high water displacement caused by her giant body mass. (V1-V2=m)

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tom pauling

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Look whos talking Matt Critchley

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How do you kill a blonde? The blonde you were planning on killing, Sarah, arrives home from a rather tiring run. She lets her hair down from her ponytail, and even though she is a little sweaty At the moment, you realize what a beautiful woman she really is. You decide to ask her to marry You, and after she says yes, you two make passionate love in the front seat Of your 2011 Cadillac Escalade.

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Q. What did Nelson say to his men before they boarded ship? A. "Board ship men"

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What happpens when a Jew walks into a wall with a boner? He breaks his nose

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Whats black and has white cream in it? Oreos

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Why doesn't Squidward wear pants? Because he's a pervert

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What's orange and sounds like a parrot? An orange parrot

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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