A Priest and a young child walk into a dark alley.... It leads to a church and he talks to the young boy about God

Q: What is black and can't support a family? A: A bowling ball

How did the boyfriend react when the girlfriend told him she was pregnant? Nothing.. He already changed his number and packed up his things and moved out of the state

Person 1 - Have you heard about the movie about constipation? Person 2 - No. Person 1 - It hasn't come out yet

What eats McDonalds for breakfast, lunch and dinner, annoys everyone around them, and could care less about anyone but themselves? The population of the United States.

In the weeks following the original release of Die Hard, reports sprung up across the nation of impressionable boys overdosing while masturbating.

why didnt the kid get anything for christmas? santa exploded

Q:What Did The Man Say When He Lost His Body A:Nothing He Die. Because If You Ever Lost Your Body You Would Die...

There was Jew, a black guy, an Asian guy, and a Mexican guy at the store. The store was called Walmart.

A Polish man is walking down the street carrying a brown paper bag. He runs into one of his buddies, who asks, "Hey! What's in the bag?" The man tells his friend that he has some fish in the bag. His friend says, "Well, I'll make you a bet. If I can guess how many fish you have in the bag, you'll have to give me one." The man replies, "I'm sorry, my friend, but gambling is against my morals, especially when my family's only nutrition for the week is on the line."

Why did the chicken cross the road? He didn't. Our fast paced American society holds little value for birds of any species and this particular chicken was flattened by Ford F-150.

yo mommas so ugly that as a child she was often teased for her looks.

What did the psycho killer order for dessert? Ice Cream.

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why did the car drive off the cliff? The driver was a potato...

Whats the best part about being alive? Not getting hit by a bus

How do u stop sky from being gay. You don't

Your mom is so fat, that she has unsightly stretch marks.

"Hey, why won't you let me through?" "These tickets are fake." "No they aren't. LOOK OVER THERE!" The guard turns around, and then turns back. Minorly inconvenienced, he arrests the man immediately, upon which he is sent to jail and anally raped multiple times.

Two men go hunting and one has a sudden heart attack. The other man calls 911 and immediately tells the operator his location and the nature of the emergency. Rescue workers arrive on the scene in a timely manner and the man makes a full recovery.

what did the boy say? please please please please goout with me

If she is old enough to bleed, she probably uses tampons.

What state is round on both ends and high in the middle? Ocoloradoo.

How do you make a baby float? 1 can root bear 2 scoop baby

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

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