How do you annoy Lady Gaga? Stab her with a knife.

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There are 3 poeple on an air plane. The pope, a boy scout, and barak obama. The plane is about to crash and there is only 2 parachutes. omba said im the president of the united states and one of the worlds smartest african americans so he jumped out. The Pope told the boy scout " i lived a long happy life you take the last parachute and jump." The boy scout replied what there are still 2 left the " worlds smartest negro jumped out with my backpack.

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Friends are like trees. If you hit them with an axe enough times, they'll fall over.

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What doesn't kill you only makes you stronger. Unless it's muscular dystrophy.

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You wanna see my secret freckle? NO! How about my butt? What!!!!!!!

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Why did the old man fall off his bicycle? Because somebody threw a fridge at him.

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So, a bulldozer rolls into a bar, there is no bar now.

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kevin kim

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How many pollacks does it take to screw in a lightbuld? Likely the same number as is required when people of non-polish descent screw in lightbulds. Overall however it is variable based on the number or bulbs, position of bulbs in relation to ceiling, potential shakiness of required ladder, and desired efficiency. Please reference GE's lightbuld home instillation handbook for further information or alternately contact your local electrician or handy neighbor.

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so... how about that airplane food

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I was Writing and i broke my pencil

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I`m not as random as you think i`m salad.

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Michael Jackson walks into a daycare center.

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Nobody enjoys your company. Nobody likes your work. Nobody loves you. There is no person who's name is legitimately nobody.

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what is the difference between a indian and a trampoline? you take you shoes off to jump on the trampoline.

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How do you save a black man from drowning? You throw him a flotation device.

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How many of amanda todd's frinds does it take to change a lightbulb? Trick question, she doesn't have any

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fava beans

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Yo momma so fat when god said let there be light he said get the fuck out the way!

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Stephen Hawking wheels into the Center for Theoretical Cosmology.

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Statistically speaking, one out if every seven dwarves are unhappy

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Roses are red violets are blue, he is for me and not for you, he's too ugly you can have him

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I walked up to my friend who's a drug addict holding a can of coke. I then told said friend that I liked the smell of coke. My friend then went on to snort 27 Kilos of cocaine.

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What's green, long, and covered in forks? Grass. I lied about the forks.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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