Why did the golfer wear two pairs of pants? It was a cold day

Whats the difference between an Irish wedding and an Irish funeral?? Theres one less drunk.

A man dies on the operating table and finds himself in front of the Pearly Gates. St Peter looks at him and says " You are having a hallucination due to all the drugs they have given you and because your brain releases chemicals when you die. I am not real and there is not heaven or a god." Upon resuscitation the man contemplates his hallucination and becomes an Atheist.

What happpens when a Jew walks into a wall with a boner? He breaks his nose

What is blue and rolls ? A blue, rolling thing.

Roses are red. I have OCD. That rose IS red right.. Let me check again.

Q. What did Nelson say to his men before they boarded ship? A. "Board ship men"

whats the difference between jimmy saville and a horse? jimmy has a bigger cock

Why did the koala fall out of the tree? Because it was dead. Why did the baby fall out of the tree? Because it was stapled to the koala.

What's black and can't climb trees? A parking lot

What did the Jewish man say when he answered the phone? Hello?

What do you call someone with the world biggest encyclopedia on their head? Dead.

how do you spend all your money you go buy stuff

Q:Why did suzie fall off the swing A:She had no arms

I walked into an elevator with Ray Rice...

a man is running away

what do you give a little girl with no legs and no arms for christmas...................cancer

What do you call it when a Priest, a Rabbi, and a Vicar meet for a drink at the bar? A social gathering.

why is 6 afraid of 7 its not, they actually have a domestic partnership going

Why did the little boy get food poisoning? Because his family can't afford to buy organic food, and can only afford McDonald's burgers, where their cows are forced to stand in their own feces.

What did the statue say to the other statue? Nothing, statues cant speak.

Knock Knock Who's There? Bill Bill Who? Builder

what did the white car look like... a black car but the color is different

Once there was an ugly barnacle. He was so ugly that everyone died. The end.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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