Where did the homeless man sleep? A rather nice hotel with fluffy pilloes

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Yo mama so fat , when she went to the doctors office and stepped on the scale they said please, your weight, not your phone number .

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knock knock who's there Alec Baldwin I just raped your children ..........

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why did the older man give candy to the little kids? he was in a parade

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Do you know what african children do? They die of starvation.

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I am white, asian and black... What am I? A panda

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Knock, Knock. Who's there? I like Pie. I like Pie who? What do you mean who? Pie isn't a person, it's a thing.

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How do you call a guy with a school bus on his head? Dead. It's highly unlikely that a man would be able to withstand the weight of a massive school bus on his head and survive.

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what did God say when He saw a black man? Oops I urnt one.

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what did the little boy say when the teacher asked what he wanted to be when he grew up? Adolf Hitler

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You are walking down the street, and a man keeps on getting in your way. You want to politely... Screw it already and stab him in the back

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Whats worse than a fart joke? A queef joke.

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What's the best part of having sex with twenty eight year olds? They are of the legal age

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What did the man say after being hit by a bus? Nothing he is now dead.

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ronald wants to join a gym, they tell him to lose 20 pounds before coming back or else.....

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Why did the kid eat so much ice cream? Because he wanted to eat ice cream.

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knock knock whos there knock knock whos there knock knock whos there poor billy didnt know that the knocking was just a tree branch and he stayed asking the same question for 21 years

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What's a Jew's favorite food? You would have to ask on an individual basis because it is unfair to say that all Jew's have the same favorite food

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How do you kill a bolonde? You have her/him do an algebra problem.

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A pink bird and a pink elephant was out flying. Then something happened.

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What did the monkey say after its tail was run over by a lawnmower? It won't be long now.

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A man walks into a bar. He is then rushed to the emergency room for severe blunt force trauma to the head and multiple cranial fractures. After years of mental therapy the man re-gains full cerebral capabilities and is extremely cautious to keep an eye out for potentially dangerous bars that present a threat to his fragile reconstructed skull.

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Why was 6 afraid of 7? Because 7 had a gun

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Why is the sky blue? As the light from our Sun shines into the atmosphere, most of the colors are able to reach the Earth’s surface uninterrupted. However, because blue light has a wavelength that is the same size as the particulates in the air, this light is scattered in every direction. This blue light bounces from particulate to particulate until it eventually reaches your eyes. For this reason, no matter what direction you look in the sky, it appears to be blue. This blue light originated with the Sun, was bounced around in the sky many times, and then eventually reached your eyes.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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