roses are red violets are blue I forogt what I was doing where am I?

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Think of a number between 2 and 10? 3.141592653589793238462643383279502884197169399375105820974944592307816406286 208998628034825342117067982148086513282306647093844609550582231725359408128481 11745028410270193852110555964462294895493038

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Your momma's so broke she might be eligible for government assistance. Seriously she should totally look into it.

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why was six afraid of seven? because seven raped his mother

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homework

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How much does a polar bear weight? The average male polar bear weights about 1500 lbs (680 kg)

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Where is the last place you would find a Mexican? In a good hiding spot that you didn't think of while trying to find him.

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Did you hear about the fire in the shoe factory? All the inventory was destroyed.

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Why did John fall down the stairs? Because John is a paraplegic and is incapable of going to down stairs without aid.

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What do the villagers say when they see Tarzan swinging into town? Look, here comes Tarzan! What do the villagers say when they see Tarzan swinging into town with sunglasses on? Nothing. They don't recognize him.

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how do you stop a speeding vehicle? throw a refrigerator at it.

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A black man, a jew, and an atheist are on a boat. Suddenly the boat started sinking. A mermaid would only save two of them. who do did she save? Mermaids don't exist. The all died. They were my friends.

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Why was the jewish boy sad? He had no friends.

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The joke below is absolute shit.

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whats worse tan loosing checkers getting lit on fire

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What word rhymes with orange? -Adult onset diabetes

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Q: What did Batman say to Robin when he noticed he had lost his belt? A: Robin! Q:What did Robin respond? A: Yes?

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A panda walks into a restaurant, sits down and orders a sandwich. After he finishes eating the sandwich, the panda pulls out a gun and shoots the waiter, and then stands up to go. "Hey!" shouts the manager. "Where are you going? You just shot my waiter and you didn't pay for your sandwich!" The panda yells back at the manager, "Hey man, I am a PANDA! Look it up!" The manager's heart skipped a beat, and he locked himself inside his office, trembling with fear and confusion. Yes, it was plausible that a beast such as this could point to a random entry on the menu, and it was physically possible for it to pull the trigger of the gun (and, at such close proximity to the waiter, it would be pretty hard to miss him), but it was shocking and altogether disturbing to hear such an animal speak in human language, much less vernacular English.

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What is brown and sticky? A stick.

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Why did the black guy scream? well, he just saw his friend get shot, and there was blood everywhere.

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GADZOOKS!

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What did the jobless man get for Christmas? Fired...

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Q: What do you call a Muslim controlling a plane? A: A pilot.

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A haiku for you Would not provide enough space To say all the nice

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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