Why can't Susie jump rope? Because she has no arms. Knock knock! who's there? Not Susie.

What's green and would kill you if it fell on you? A golf course

What did the child with no arms and no legs get for Christmas? Cancer.

A cow walks into the butcher shop, he looks around then mourns the loss of his brothers

She is so fast We call her Email Instead of Emily...

What do Jews always complain & want money for? Anything

why did the girl break up with her boyfriend? hes gay

How do you stop a train? You don't, unless your the conductor in which case you would hit the brake.

knock knock whos there? IRS Oh....

What do you can a Brazilian woman wearing a bikini? It depends on the case, but usually Brazilian women are named "Maria", "Ana", "Júlia" and many others kinds of names, with their root being hispanic, portguese and latin lenguages. Respectively, the names quoted have the English translation being "Mary", for Maria, "Anne", for Ana, and July, for Júlia.

Two olives are sitting on a counter, one falls off and the other one asks "Are you okay?" and he replies, "It is only a slight wound I think I will be just fine"

What's black and white and red all over? A newspaper painted red.

What's green and blue that is shaped like the earth? The earth

what's brown and sticky? a stick.

Q:What do you call a black man who flies a plane? A: A pilot you racist jerk...

19 cats 33 hamsters 24 turtles and 23 dogs are all in a small cage, PETA is not happy.

Eats shoots and leaves Pandas. If you can't figure this out then you're probably 12

how did the jewish man die He had a fatal hard attack

What's a black guys favourite thing to eat? Food.

Why does Frank hate Jim? He killed his son.

What did the man with Alzheimer's get for Christmas? Happy New Year!

Why was six afraid of seven? because seven had diarrhea

An Englishman, an Irishman and a Scotsman walk into a bar. They have trouble understanding each other.

A boy walks up to a girl and says "Do you like ice cream? Cuz I have a huuuuuge penis."

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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