What's the square root of 6739472? Who gives a f***?

a fish swimming in the water swims

When one person has an imaginary friend, you call it being crazy. But when more than one person has the same imaginary friend, you call it religion.

Why did the chicken cross the road? Well, it was kind of by chance that it crossed the road and what is the big deal lots of animals cross the road. For example possums, squirrels, deer, raccoons, cats, dogs, rabbits do pretty often too it's weird because sometimes more rabbits cross the road on Easter I don't know if that's just me though, chipmunks, bears, over in Africa probably tigers and lions cross those roads.

whats the same about a spider and a grape? they both have eight legs, except for the grape.

Do you like impressions? Why? That's Socrates

Why can't Helen Keller drive? She is a woman.

Roses are red Violets are blue Charcoal is black So is my neighbor

Why did Charlotte fall off the swing? She got hit in the face with an axe.

Q.Why did Beethoven kill his chicken? A. It had contracted a serious illness. He had killed it as an act of mercy.

What crime does a tree commit in order to be sent to prison? Trees on.

Two giraffes walk into a bar, hit their heads, cracktheir skulls and die.

What do you call a billionaire who lost a large portion of their net worth? A millionaire.

What's the difference between Hitler and Stalin? Nothing because pineapples aren't vegetables.

why did suzy drop her ice cream? she got hit by a bus. knock knock! who's there? not suzy.

Why was six afraid of seven? Because seven was a homicidal maniac.

What do you call a horse with wings and a horn on his head? Drunk

Roses are red, violets are blue if God makes us beautiful, Who made you?

A man walks into a bar He is STD positive.

Why can't Helen Keller drive? Because she is blind and deaf, and to put her behind the wheel of a motorized vehicle would be extremely dangerous.

why did the deer jump, because there was something in it's way

why did the chicken cross the road? it was making its way home after a long day of luckless job interviews

a man made a beautiful colorful picture and hit print. the printer then grew a mind of its own and did the most horriffic and evil thing ever; he printed it in black and white.

Chikin nuggets are cooler than your mom!!!!!!!

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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