Goldilocks walks into a bar. But its not really a bar, it's a bear cave and she is eaten by porridge eating bears.

why did the chicken cross the road? dunno. i wasnt there.

Why did the chicken cross the road? It didn't, most chickens are held on farms, but those that do roam free are afraid of automobiles so therefore they wouldn't go near a road at all. But if the chicken was located in a deserted town there would be no traffic, so then it would be able to cross freely over any road there and not get injured or mortally wounded.

A man with Down's Syndrome walks into bar. Bartender asks, "why the long face?"

Why did Billy drop his ice-cream? He got stabbed multiple times

A man walks up to an attractive woman and asks "Is it hot in here, or is it just you?" The woman replies "No, it's hot in here. It is a record breaking 114 degrees outside, which means everybody is using their air conditioner. Due to the large amount of energy air condioners require, the power has gone out in this building and the air conditioner is not functional. The tempurature in the building is 103 degrees and three children are in the emergency room because of heat stroke."

Why was the asian boy made fun of in the locker room? Because of the nipple piercing he had.

Why are lizards broke? Because they run around the desert with no money...

What do you call a person with no legs and an eyepatch? Names.

What did Batman say to Robin before they got into the Batmobile? Robin, get into the Batmobile.

5

How many gays does it take to change a light bulb? 1, even if hes not happy im sure he would still be able to change it.

You heard about that piece of shit that says no all the time? Yes, I bet you haven't though. no.

I am not racist., I have a black man in my family tree! He is still hanging there

How can you kill someone who looks like a squirrel? With an bomb. That would kill most people.

Hehe and Haha are best friends. One day, Haha died. What did Hehe do? He said "Haha! you died!"

ask me if i'm a tree are you a tree? No.

What did the polar bear say when he walked into a sauna? Absolutely nothing because he was a polar bear. I mean seriously, did I even have to ask? Everyone should know that a polar bear is an animal and he wouldn't say anything. If he did it would most likely be a growl or a roar. If you believed that he would have said something you obviously didn't pass the first grade. I finish with the fact that a polar bear would not survive in a sauna because they are accustomed to cold climate. I guess this was just a waste of time.

penis

What did the black man say to the asian? Hey.

Why did the little girl fall off the swing? Because at the climax point in the swing, gravity is making a much larger affect on you because you are pulling farther away from the earth as well as positioning your body in a way where it is awkward and unstable to support your body, which greatly increases the chance of you falling off and landing on the ground.

Whats the difference between an Irish wedding and an Irish funeral?? Theres one less drunk.

What is pink, female and has two dicks? A mother with two sons, both called Richard.

What happened to the man who had the most loving parents and family when he was born, had an amazing childhood which he shared with so many good friends, was loved everywhere, helped the poor, started a fundraiser for starving kids in africa, got a college education, helped a complete stranger get off his drug addiction, married a beautiful woman, bought a nice house and had 3 children who he loved dearly and spent time with as much as he possibly could, tucked them in every night and enjoyed every second of his life as if it was his last? He died.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

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The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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