A mexican and a black guy are in a car. Who's driving? The chauffer, they are both rich business men.

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How many ants does it take to fill an apartment? It depends on the size of the apartment.

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A man opens his refrigerator and takes out a can of soda. He returns back to his living area and continues watching television.

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Have you seen Stevie Wonder's new house? No. Neither has he.

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What's funnier than killing a bunch of orphans? Pretty much anything is funnier than that. What's wrong with you?

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What did the man say to his wife? We are both men. Apart from you.

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one day a grape was in the sun raisin

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-I once had a dog with no legs, and do you know how I named him? -...? -I didn't name him, he wouldn't come...

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A blond, teen girl with a pink hat and glasses goes to the doctor, and she says, "Doctor, doctor! I keep hearing bees, whislting, humming birds, and Tom Jones! Whats happening to me?!" The doctor says, "Tinnitus".

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What's worse than being a Packer Fan? Walking around with cheese on your hea... oh, wait....

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Why couldn't Carys answer the phone? - She had an ear infection.

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How many licks does it take for a pedophile to get to the center of a Tootsie Pop? Given a simple random sample of pedophiles, they will most likely have the same statistical standard normal distribution of tongue sizes and saliva efficacy as any other part of the population. Therefore, that question in regards to the tongues of pedophiles is irrelevant and remains unanswered.

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Confucius says... The superior man, when resting in safety, does not forget that danger may come. When in a state of security he does not forget the possibility of ruin. When all is orderly, he does not forget that disorder may come. Thus his person is not endangered, and his States and all their clans are preserved.

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Why did Jordan miss the bus? The bus didn't miss hitting him.

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What happens if you fight Chuck Norris? You might lose or win.

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Did you see Stevie Wonder's new house? No? Don't worry, he didn't either

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A blonde is standing on the edge of a 20-story building. He's had a rather rough life.

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Every 60 seconds in Africa.... A minute passes.

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Whats the difference between a Jew and a pizza? Pizza is not a group of people but in fact a dish originating in the Middle East.

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1,984

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A penguin is driving through Arizona when his car's oil pressure light comes on. He drops his car off with a mechanic who says he'll get to it soon, and to come back in an hour. The penguin leaves the garage and, seeing a Baskin-Robbins across the street, stops in and orders a dish of ice cream. As he eats the ice cream he reflects on the series of extraordinary events that led him to this place, this time, this situation.

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Once there was a man, he was accused of false accusations.

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Q: why can't dinosaurs sing? A: because they're dead!!!

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What does the Cookie Monster eat? Nothing. The Cookie Monster is not a living, sentient being and does not require sustenance to live.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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