Your mama's so old that typical places of business grant her the senior citizen discount.

Whats the easiest way to solve problems in Haiti? Nuke them.

boobs

What did the squirrel say to the dog? "I have AIDS."

Your mams so fat that she has aids... and i gave it to her

Whenever anybody asks me to help me find something they lost, I say: "Look where it is and you will find it."

what is sam ross' favorite word to use in conversation? awesam

A blond, teen girl with a pink hat and glasses goes to the doctor, and she says, "Doctor, doctor! I keep hearing bees, whislting, humming birds, and Tom Jones! Whats happening to me?!" The doctor says, "Tinnitus".

What did one Teacher say to the other teacher? Nothing. The first teacher has a horrible drinking habbit which is getting out of hand, He beats his wife and children each night after his drinks at the bar. His parents have stopped all contact and he found some divorce papers in his wifes draw, also saying she would be getting full costudy of the children. He has lost the majority of his friends and didnt want to loose another one, and kept his problems to himself.

knock knock GO AWAY I'M IN THE SHOWER

What's better than ice cream? Anal sex

Do you know what does Wikipedia says about Elton John ? It says that Sir Elton Hercules John, CBE (born Reginald Kenneth Dwight; 25 March 1947) is an English singer-songwriter, composer and pianist. He has worked with his songwriting partner Bernie Taupin since 1967; they have collaborated on more than 30 albums to date.

what did the dog do when he saw the flea?he ate it because he didn't know what would happen next

Sonic

What is the difference between Michael Jackson and Neil Armstrong? Neil Armstrong was the first one to walk on the moon... and Michael Jackson molested little children.

So this one time at band camp... a flute gave me an STD.

What do you call children with no arms or legs ...their names

What would you if I slapped you in the face with a fish? Unless you are a push-over, it is likely that you would retaliate with anger.

A inventor was wandering around the desert one day, then he found a magic lamp, he rubbed on it and thus came up a genie! The genie asked: What do you want? The inventor responded: Meh, no idea... Thy wish is granted, answered the genie. The now ex inventor never came up with something new ever again.. Moral: Huh?

why did the girl cross the road ? to get run over by a flee of running cows

HEY EVERYONE THUMBS UP!

roses are red violets are blue your baby has down syndrome

So theres a priest, a rabbi, and an athiest on a cliff. They all remark at the beautiful view and take plenty of pictures with their respected families.

Why did the chicken cross the road? Why not

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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