Steven Hawking walks into a bar. No he doesn't.

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What did one Teacher say to the other teacher? Nothing. The first teacher has a horrible drinking habbit which is getting out of hand, He beats his wife and children each night after his drinks at the bar. His parents have stopped all contact and he found some divorce papers in his wifes draw, also saying she would be getting full costudy of the children. He has lost the majority of his friends and didnt want to loose another one, and kept his problems to himself.

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Q : What did Piers tell his friend before leaving ? A : Bye.

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What's worst than finding a worm in your apple? The Holocaust.

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Why did Nigel decide to lie and remain on the ground? He didn't. Somebody beat him ruthlessly and stole his wheelchair. Nigel has no legs by the way.

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Why did Uncle Monty shove his head up a horses arse? Because it gave Doris an erection. She chose to keep her male genital organs following her gender changing procedure, so that she could still father children.

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what do you get when you combine fire and water? alcohol

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roses are red violets are blue your baby has down syndrome

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Q. What is green and has wheels? A. Grass, I was joking about the wheels.

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why was the little girl afraid of the dark because she was brutally raped in the dark when she was 4.

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What's worse than finding a repeated joke on Anti-Joke? Your family being massacred in front of your eyes.

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What did one muffin say to the other muffin? Nothing. Muffins are incapable of speaking.

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why did the girl cross the road ? to get run over by a flee of running cows

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Baking a cake can be very hard and stressful, just like beating a slut with an axe.

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What do you call a white guy with a taller black woman? A man in a deeply committed relationship.

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Moves Like AJgger- Marron 5

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Why couldn't Carys answer the phone? - She had an ear infection.

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A horse walks into a bar and the bartenders says, "why the long face?" The horse doesn't respond because horses do not comprehend English. He then becomes startled by his surroundings and bolts out of the bar, knocking over a few tables.

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When's the best time to go to the dentist? When you have an appointment.

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What did Batman say to Robin before they get into the Batmobile? -Come on Robin, get into the Batmobile!

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400 asian people walked in a bar

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A dog walked into a bar. The bartender barked at the dog and the dog replied with, "I don't speak dog language."

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roses are grey violets are grey im colorblind but your face is still black!!!

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Why did the girl fall off the fridge? She tripped on a rock.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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