a. how did you shoot the rabbit? b. with my banana

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What do you call a fish with no eyes? Fsh

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how do u get a blonde to stay away from her credit card... i dont know im blonde

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What's the difference between a Jew and a pizza? It's illegal to eat the Jew.

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why did the chicken cross the road? dunno. i wasnt there.

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The president, Oprah and Abraham Lincoln are sitting in a crashing airplane. lol

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Why did the little boy get food poisoning? Because his family can't afford to buy organic food, and can only afford McDonald's burgers, where their cows are forced to stand in their own feces.

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What do you call a dead, black child? Dead.

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Knock Knock Who's There? Bill Bill Who? Builder

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Once there was an ugly barnacle. He was so ugly that everyone died. The end.

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*Knock knock! "Who's there?" "Jehovah's witness" .....

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What did the statue say to the other statue? Nothing, statues cant speak.

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After tesco's horse burgers, what's next? My lidl pony

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Q: Where can you find a cat with no arms and no legs? A: Right where you left him Q: Where can you find a dog with no arms and no legs? A: In a bun

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Q: What did the farmer say when he coudn't find his tractor? A: "where's my tractor?"

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If a girl sleeps with 20 guys, she's a slut. If a guy does the same... He's Gay.

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Don't you sometime just want to chop of your toes and stomp around to prove to the so called 'experts' that it is possible for a person to walk without toes? . . . . . . me neither

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What did the blonde do when her car broke down? Made a Facebook status about then called animal control.

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A child is in the grocery checkout with their parents. It sees the candy display and asks for a pack of Reese's. When the parents do not grant the child's request, they begin to scream and cry. When they arrive home, the child is beaten with a copper rod. The new puppy that the child got for a birthday present is hanged and fed to buzzards.

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Q: What do you call a man with no arms and no legs in a bed? A: The victim of a serious car accident in a hospital bed.

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How do you wake up lady gaga? Poke her face

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I called your friend gay and he hit me with his fist because he was angry at me for using gay in a derogatory way.

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A man walks in on his wife blowing Bubbles. Two weeks later they are divorced.

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Steven hawking walks into a bar. a.w j.p

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops