What do the poor have that the rich need? Nothing.

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A boy and his father are in a car crash. The father dies and the son is transported to the nearest hospital. Once there, a surgeon is brought in to operate on the boy. The surgeon steps back and says "I can't operate on this boy, I haven't had enough training for such a situation." The hospital calls in another surgeon and they are more qualified for the event. Then the surgeon wakes up and realizes the boy is in critical condition. There is blood drenching his shirt and there is only seconds to operate. Suddenly, the boy wakes up and realizes he has just survived a car crash. Suddenly Leonardo DeCaprio enters with a girl. The world turns on its side and they all wake up to find them selves a victim of Inception. Then the caterpillar wakes up and realizes it has immense mental capacity, even above those of an above-average human. Then I woke up and realized I lost my job. MLIA.

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A man walks in to a bar, so he got hurt.

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knock knock who's there doctor doctor who No

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What did the little boy become for Halloween? An orphan, his parents were killed that day.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? The farmer left his fence open and the chicken happened to cross a road.

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Three politicians walk into a sports bar. Suddenly, everyone is watching the Stanley Cup playoffs.

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Your momma so fat, she's fat

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Rose are red Violets are blue And I really hate you Friends?????

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How do you confuse a blond? Dress up as Lady Gaga and yell "Ni!" in her face.

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Why did the boy rip out all of his hair? He was insane.

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Why did Sally get hit with a fridge? Because someone threw a fridge at Sally Why would someone throw a fridge at her? Because Sally has no arms

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Why did the monkey fall out of the tree? He was dead. Why did the second monkey fall out of the tree? He was stapled to the first one. Why did the third monkey fall out of the tree? Peer pressure.

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Siete inglesi quindi non sapete nemmeno cosa c'è scritto ? Succhiacapre che non siete altro.

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When your scuba diving why do u jump off backwards beacause if u jump forwards than u witll still be in the boat!!!!!!

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Why can't black people be in a talent show? Because they'll steal the show.

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What's brown, no one likes and has had a bad history? Dog poop

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An Irish, an English, a Chinese and a French are together in a boat. And it shows the diversity of our society.

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Why did Santa's little helper feel depressed? Neurotransmitters essential for happiness, such as serotonin and norepinephrine, were in rather low supply in the poor elf's brain.

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Who did the man call when his house was on fire? He called his mother as the firefighters put out the fire.

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knock knock who's there i lost my wallet my nan died

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The blondes on the opposite part of the lake is a pretty good joke

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Joke.

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What is red white and blue Blood. I was lying about the white and blue.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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