I was (really) asked one day by a guy if I wanted to star in a porn movie... Before I could even think about it he asked my 14 year old sister "Do you want to join in too?" And that kids, is why I am stuck in jail for pushing up a boot up a guys ass... Well replace boot with dick, and guys ass with my 14 year old sister and yeah... Naw... seriously she has hueg boobs though... at the age of 14, damn those melons have not even gone a bit greenish yellow and they are still growing... ...Hey Cassandra, its NeroMetal, good thing I am not your brother and that you are 19 right? NOT TO BE CONFUSED WITH THAT NEROISM DUDE THAT CHATS HERE, I play videogames, and write books, and sign books... ...Then some guy sees my real name is Nero and goes that guy on horsehead network? Who? HE SUCKS! SUCKS ASS!

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I have a red ferrari and 20 dead babies in my garage. Didn't I have a blue ferrari?

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A Panda walks into a bar and orders a drink, he then shoots the bartender and leaves. The people are shocked and the panda is arrested.

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What d u tell Simba when he's moving to slow? Muvasa

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Why don't dinosaurs talk anymore? Because they're all dead, duh. :P

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What do you get if you buy a big mac with a ten pound note? Change.

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5 little monkeys jumping on the bed, one fell off and bumped his head. Momma called the doctor and the doctor said, "He has a mild concussion."

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what does the NAACP stand for? Now Apes Are Called People.

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What do you call two banana's on someone's feet? Garbage.

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homework

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The joke below is absolute shit.

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Why was the jewish boy sad? He had no friends.

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Bear walks into bar and says to eagle may I have a................... drink eagle says why the long pause hohahahohahahohaha

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What did the lawyer say to a lawyer? We're both lawyers.

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how do you stop a speeding vehicle? throw a refrigerator at it.

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Q: What do you call a cow with no legs? A: Lunch.

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I like toast -my name is Bob and I approve of this message

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There's a car about to hit me.

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Why did 4 Christians, 2 Jews, 1 Muslim, 1 Buddhist and an atheist squeeze into a Honda Accord? One of their co-workers at Appleby's made a compelling case for the financial and environmental benefits of carpooling.

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A. Knock Knock B. Welcome!

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Knock Knock Who's there? Eat a dick you sh!t fukk! I'm going have to ask you leave now,

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Why is a budgie Because the other leg is yellow

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Why did the blond laugh at work? Because she farted. It was rather uncomfortable for everyone involved.

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Why was the blonde fired from her job as a nurse? Because she ate all the babies in the nursery (She didn't even leave one for the director of the hospital to eat!)

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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