Roses are red Violets are blue I have five finger and the middle is for you

thumb_up thumb_down +26

You might be a redneck if you spent all day in the sun without sunscreen.

thumb_up thumb_down +18

How do you get rid of a stalker? You throw a fridge at them!

thumb_up thumb_down +6

I was trying to think of a joke to write, but then I became unsatisfied with my creativity and began to spiral into a depressing tangent of thoughts. I just took 37 Ambien, and have approximately ten minutes to live. Instead, I will spend my last moments writing goodbye messages to friends on Facebook and longingly looking at images of the past. Goodbye, world.

thumb_up thumb_down

A mexican and a black guy are in a car. Who's driving? The chauffer, they are both rich business men.

thumb_up thumb_down

1,984

thumb_up thumb_down -4

Sheesh people! Stop insulting my last comment! Do not GO into my comment section, I do not WANT YOU to keep thumbing up those that call me pedo. Moral: Norway... you gonna call us all pedophiles? Please... besides I prefer them over nineteen... the downside is that they often got a couple of kids already at that age... Sigh...

thumb_up thumb_down -8

Whats the worst part about being fat. Your fat.

thumb_up thumb_down -184

Yo mamma's so fat, she should try NutriSystem.

thumb_up thumb_down +63

An englishman, irish-man and a scotsman walk into a bar. Englishman orderds a pint of becks, Irishman a guiness and the Scot a whiskey. Everything is absolutely fine and nothing of even remote interest happens.

thumb_up thumb_down +59

So this guy is driving down the road and he is going real slow, he was going so slow in fact he wasn't even moving, because he was dead.

thumb_up thumb_down +39

What did the homeless war veteran get for christmas? Nothing because we don't treat our veterans very well.

thumb_up thumb_down +35

Bob fell off his roof.

thumb_up thumb_down +33

Dont look at me.

thumb_up thumb_down +23

Joe Paterno dosn't walk into a police station.-South Park

thumb_up thumb_down +17

Why did Uncle Monty shove his head up a horses arse? Because it gave Doris an erection. She chose to keep her male genital organs following her gender changing procedure, so that she could still father children.

thumb_up thumb_down +13

Ask me if I am a cat. Are you a cat? No, what kind of stupid question is that?

thumb_up thumb_down +13

Did you see Stevie Wonder's new house? No? Don't worry, he didn't either

thumb_up thumb_down +11

knock knock. who's there thatsron thatsron who thatsron man

thumb_up thumb_down -1

A man walks into a bar. He sees his wife with another man. That man is his brother.

thumb_up thumb_down -1

Whats worse than the holucaust.......... Nothing

thumb_up thumb_down -13

Whats Brown and sticky... Shit

thumb_up thumb_down -19

Why was six afraid of seven? Because Se7en was a scary movie!

thumb_up thumb_down -51

Why do I staple a mans mouth to his penis. Because I wanted to

thumb_up thumb_down -53

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops