What do you call a hot underaged girl. off limits i am her father.

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What's blue and orange at the bottom of a swimming pool? A dead baby, why's it there? I popped the arm bands.

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A man claims to own a talking dog. A skeptic approaches the man and his dog and asks for a demonstration. The man asks his dog, "How does sandpaper feel?" The dog says, "Ruff!" The skeptic is not convinced. The man then asks his dog, "Who is the greatest baseball player of all time?" The dog, who like all dogs cannot fully comprehend human speech, proceeds to lick his balls.

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How do you blind fold an asian? Dental floss!

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How old are you like 10? Im 11 so shut the fuck up

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Knock knock Who's there This is the police, open the door. I don't know anybody by that name

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A black man walks into a bar. His parents were immigrants from South Africa.

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If she is under the age of 18 years old and is identified by your state as a minor, shes too young for you bro.

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Roses are red, Violets are blue. I have Alzheimer's, Who are you?

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Knock Knock Who's there? Your landlord. Get the hell out.

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whats funnier than a joke? A: a funnier joke

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Is the boy sleeping? No, he's dead!

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Why was Sally crying? Because she had a frog stapled to her face.

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Your mom is soooo fat..... She'll most likely suffer a heart attack

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What did the farmer say when he lost his coat? Where's my coat.

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What do you get if you cross a Kangaroo and a Sheep? They are too entirely different species and cannot be crossbred.

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Knock knock. Racism.

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Roses are red Violets are tits I like tits Tits

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Why is it that many lawyers have broken noses? Because they often have to interact with violent and distrustful criminals.

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OK. so a guy walks up to another guy and says hi. The other guy said nothing. The other guy said hi again. The guy said nothing The guy got really mad and slapppeed him across the face. Finally the man said PURPLE RABBID COMPUTER TREES!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! and walked away while liking his blue brick.

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Wanna know something funny? Your face

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If a quiz is a quizzical what is a test? A testicle

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Duh, its red not ginger, like really really red... Not unlike my eyes, which is a bit of the reason I dye it., I also use colored contact lenses most of the time now.

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So a guy walks into a bar. He asks the woman next to him, ''Can I buy you a drink?'' The woman says,''No thank you.''

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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