Why do I staple a mans mouth to his penis. Because I wanted to

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I was in the middle of downloading a porno of two hot girls getting it on, my computer got a virus and crashed.

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when the doctor asked him why he was sad andreas replyd i have a small penis and drew and devin keep making me drop the soap

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Steven Hawking walks into a bar. No he doesn't.

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Why did Hellen Keller masturbate with her left hand? Because her right hand was tired.

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Moves Like AJgger- Marron 5

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An englishman, irish-man and a scotsman walk into a bar. Englishman orderds a pint of becks, Irishman a guiness and the Scot a whiskey. Everything is absolutely fine and nothing of even remote interest happens.

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What did the homeless war veteran get for christmas? Nothing because we don't treat our veterans very well.

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whats red and can fall on you blood from a hunted duck.

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What did Batman say to Robin before they get into the Batmobile? -Come on Robin, get into the Batmobile!

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Don't you just hate it when sentences don't end how you think they TESTACLES

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You might be a redneck if you spent all day in the sun without sunscreen.

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What smells like shit and is covered in cheese? Sean's pizza socks.

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What do you get when you cross and unicorn with a loaf of bread? Cantaloupe

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Why did the baker have brown hands: Because he was black

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What does the cup-cake say to the cake? Do you want a cup in your cake to make it cup-cake?

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A man walks into a bar. He's an alcoholic, and it's destroying he's family

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Why does Marcus keep playing dumb games instead of doing his goelogy. No one knows.

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A man opens his refrigerator and takes out a can of soda. He returns back to his living area and continues watching television.

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What's wrong the a man who can't tell where he is, can't tell where he's going, and doesn't know how to use a map? Downs Syndrome

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cats are afraid of dogs. mice are afraid of cats. elephants are afraid of mice. bf-2 fighter jets are afraid of elephants. is this true?

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Your mams so fat that she has aids... and i gave it to her

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Roses are red, violets are blue, trains.

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Kill me? Lol, come get me sis, I can kill you wit my mullet, nobody wants to take my phone, but your sister already replied to my "anna fuck" with "arent you married buddy? :)" yeah a smiley, ill show you! The doors are open, if I fail to take you out, I am not deserving of living futher, course yea mother blusx to everywown, I mean she is horny all the tiem! Anywaz, hurry up, im out of stims so im fallin sleeps, told ur sis to send me a nude pic, rite now... so this mite take 3 minuts. Hey, watch the next pic im gonna send you, that should motivate you to fight me sersly, i men sure im slo, but imma sp ful ov valeium dat i feel nor feear no pain... never feeer pain so whateves... Nah your sis is skinny, thats not here, the pixture is fakye, for now... u dyou know dat she keeps snending them hearte and smile and even a smilei with a rose, thats FLIRIIIIIING! Flirting, anyway you get the picture, but I wont respon anymor becuz i am shuttin down this pc and gonna dream abot the things to0 you sis. ;)

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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