Why did the Quantum chicken cross the road? It was already on both sides.

roses are red leather is black when when god made you he was smoking crack

Q: What do you call three black people in a car? A: Maltesers

a girl and a guy rented a hotel room for a night. theyre siblings and stayed up all night watching very classy movies about farm animals and each of them ordered a chocolate cake to eat while watching their fantastic informational film.

What did the bully call the box? a square, needless to say the box was offended

Yo Mama So Fat ... She Look Like Dis ///(*<>*)\\\ | | | | <=> <=>

What do you get when you add a cucumber some vinegar some salt and you get..... Macaroni and cheese

Whats worse than three dead women in a ditch ? 4 dead women in a ditch.

What do you call a Muslim flying a plane? A pilot.

whats worse than being mentally challenged? losing your arms and legs and finding out that you have cancer

A man walks into a bar. He is an alcoholic with a family of four and is ruining his life. -Tag

Q.sam is 18 years old, why can't she get her licence? A.because Sam is a lost dog on the street

Gary Busey walk into a bar. Everyone Ran out noticing the potential danger.

Knock knock Who's there? Illiteracy.

What's The Difference Between A Refridgerator And The Holocaust ? Not Much.

Q: If Hitler spots a jew, what will he do? A: You suck at history dude, Hitler is dead! Moral: What? You did not get the daily news?

Why did the chicken cross the road? He looked both ways and saw there was no traffic.

Ask me if i'm a fish. Are you a fish? Do I look like a fish?

your mother is so rather large that when she stepped onto a scale, it stated her exact body weight which was 280 pounds. Which come to think of it isn't that big considering that obesity is now the norm and average people are referred to as abnormal.

Okay, but cut me some slack here, its not as straight forward as it sounds, I got at least twice as many active synapses as other people do, that means twice the thought process, in video games I can for example remember twice the commands, and such. Sadly this does not mean that I can think twice as fast or twice as smart, but rather that I do so involuntarily in short spans, until I burn myself out. So be a bit nice to me, when I say that I have since I was a kid used about 2.5-7.5 mg valium, this is just because my thought process works so fast I burn out because well, I got the processor, but it burns out, excuse me my wife needs some help with her cellphone, see you soon

Knock Knock Nobody answered because the people in the house were away.

Why cant steve get a job? Because Steve Jobs is DEAD! Moral: And people are all like "you gotta respect the dead", uh... Why not respect people while they are alive? Humanity is so fucking "smart" sometimes ya? Not that your answer matters...

Guess what I did to the clown I hit it with an axe

there once was a time before bonerss it sucked it sucked real bad like that kid who never washes his gym closes bad Mason Manning JLR

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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