was michael jackson black or white? how many licks does it take to get to the center of a tootsie poop? the world will never know

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Why was six afraid of seven? Back in middle school, they were both friends. They hung out every day and always had the best fun. It wasn't until their baseball team made it to the junior championship. That was when seven started doping for better strength and endurance for the game. Sevens family and friends (Especially six,) Had started to notice a change in sevens behavior and he seemed more distant from any social relationships with others. Seven began to become angry and self centered and only seemed to be focused on the game. Seven found out that Six knew that he was doping and fought him and brutally injured Six. Seven was then found out by the coaches and was kicked off the team. Seven, knowing that he had ruined his whole life, Shot himself with his dads .38 Revolver.

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What rude names do you call a girl with no limbs? Anything you want they can't touch you

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Your mom is so fat, it is unlikely that she will be able to survive the month without experimental liposuction and heart surgery, and even then her outlook is bleak. I am so sorry.

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What did the banker say to the other banker? We're both bankers!

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Knock Knock Who's there? DC Soames. I'm arresting you for the suspected abduction and rape of Holly Harman.

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What's green and looks like a red apple? A green apple

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Why did Jesus cross the road? He didn't. He's dead.

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A Christian walks in into a bar . . . mitzvah.

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I what's the difference between a baby and a watermelon? I don't have 10 watermelons in my basement.

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How do you kill a blonde? Stab her repeatedly in the chest with a ball point pen

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a gay couple walks into a bar and get a drink

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Why did carly drop her groceries Carly is a cow

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What's green and blue that is shaped like the earth? The earth

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Why couldn't Helen Keller drive? because she was SHITFACED!!!!

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Who is blue and smells like green paint? Matt Daly

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What starts with N, ends with R, and is a black guy? NeighboR!

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Why is six afraid of seven? Because seven is a homicidal maniac, six has every right to be afraid

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Why didn't the skeleton go to the dance? Because it is the decaying remains of a corpse and therefore lacks brain and muscle tissue depriving it of the ability of though and movement both of which are key skills in the art of dancing.

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Why did the girl scream? Someone shot her mom

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Q: Why was the little boy upset? A: His nose was glued to the sidewalk.

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why did the chicken cross the road? it was making its way home after a long day of luckless job interviews

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What's clear and wet? water

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I really might try and kill myself when I get home tonight.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops