KNOCK KNOCK! Who's there? KNOCK KNOCK! Umm... Who's there? KNOCK KNOCK! OMG I SWEAR TO GOD WHO THE HECK IS THERE?!?!? KNOCK KNOCK! *opens door* Oh.... It was a woodpecker...

What did the Arab do when he got frustrated? Burned himself

A boy has a penis, a girl has a vagina.

Why can't you fly? Cause Ruddell says so.

So a man walks into a bar, He says, "Hey bartender! Can I have some beer?" The bartender says, "Sure!" and hands the man a Bud Light. The man drinks the Bud Light and leaves afterward.

What's the hardest part about eating a vegetable? The wheelchair.

How did Darth Vader make the little black boy's day? "I am your father"*heavy breath, heavy breath*

Studies show that 95% of house fires are caused by fire.

69 :)

once upon a time y o u m a d BIBIBIDYYEAHBIIBAIDYEAH THAT'S ALL FOLKS

A man walks into a bra. Bra kills him...

Q. How do you make an oil lamp turn off? A. Break it.

Q: How many flies does it take to screw in a light bulb? A: Well considering the weight of a fly is 1.2 grams, and the weight of a light bulb is 50 grams (and this is assuming that the fly can lift its own body weight) it would take 41.6 flies. But also considering the fact, that the .6th of a fly is impossible, because it is more than likely to be deceased, it is impossible for flies to screw in a light bulb.

Knock Knock Whos there? It's me Ben. You just told me to come over. We are going jogging aren' we? Oh ya, sorry. I forgot the time. Is it cold out? Ya, it is pretty cold. You should bring a jacket. Ok, let me go get my jacket. Alright, can u grab me a water please? Ya sure. Thankyou.

What's worse than finding half a worm in your apple whilst you're in a bar after finding out you have cancer when you visited your families grave? Having a refrigerator thrown at you by an aids infected monkey with no arms or legs.

How do you stop a baby from drowning? Take your foot of his head

How do you make a homeless person cry? cut an onion in front of him.

Where do you find a dog? At a pet store.

why did the blind man crash his car? he had down syndrome.

Q: Why did the plane crash? A: Because the pilot was a loaf of bread.

What's the difference between a whore and a blonde? There is not enough information to answer this question.

What would Hitler say if you give him a sandwich? Thankyou!

A man walks into a bar... "Ouch"

you lose.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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