Why can't Hellen Keller drive? Because she is blind, deaf, and dead.

Nohypocondrism: When you feel fine and everyone keeps telling you you are a sick bastard. Charisma: Hey, that guy that changed my life killed the neighbor, cool rite? I mean that damn neighbor did say nothing to me when I said hi. Solitude: When the room is so overcrowded that you feel small and alone. I think that people that are jack of all trades and master of none are stupid... I AM JACK OF NO TRADES AND MASTER OF ALL! I am nothing, because nothing lives on forever, nothing is unbreakable, nothing is really awesome on a terrible day... I am also Nobody, because Nobody has more money than me.. FUUUUUUUU..

Your mama is so fat she suffered from diabetes and died of heart failure .

what did the little boy say to little girl? I shit bricks.

there was a blonde and abrunette and they both jumped off a bridge . who hit the bottom first? the brunette beacuase when the blonde was halfway down she had to walk back up and ask for directions

Why are they called waiters? Because you got to wait for them for a fucking long time. Why do they call you a patient. Just so you wont get impatient, if you do you are no longer a patient and they will ignore you.

Why did the koahla fall out of the tree? It died.

What do you call 55,000 clowns exiting a small car? Fiction.

Why did sally fall off the swing? She had no arms.

What do you call cheese thats not yours? Somebody elses cheese

How many Asians did it take to screw in a lightbulb? 1 Asians are just like every one else

Why was 6 afraid of 7? because 7 had a gun.

if youre reading this its probably because youre on anti-joke.com

What is the difference between a black man and a Chevrolet? They didn't sell Chevrolets in the 1800s.

Yd the chicken cross the road? To SAVE THE WORLD

what did the girl who's father was murdered do at her wedding? not have a father daughter dance.

Roses are red Bacon is red Poems are hard Bacon

A gay jew walked into a bar. Just kidding, for there was only a red blanket.

Q: Whats A Schoolbus Full Of Black Children??? A: A Rotten Banana!!!

How do you find out how many Mexicans are living in the United States? Take a Census.

Why did schlomo fall off the swing He lost balance because Muslims threatened to kill him

Why did the woman leave the kitchen. Its was her funeral

What does the color 9 smell like? Purple, because aliens don't wear hats

What do you call a black guy that drives a plane? A pilot

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

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