A black guy and a mexican guy are in a car, Who's driving. A policeman.

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Why did the man die? He got shot!

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im jacob, i have as much hair on my penis as mr macs head.....none.

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Why did the duck eat the chicken noodle soup? The duck was told that if he ate the chicken noodle soup on Fear Factor he would win $10,000. What he failed to realize was that he forgot to sign page 16 on the episode contract and did not win any money and was sued by Campbell's soup for copyright infringement.

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Why could the boy not stop shaking? He has Parkinsons Syndrome.

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A cow walks into the butcher shop, he looks around then mourns the loss of his brothers

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How do you make a girl wet? Throw her in the pool

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Whats the quickest way to a woman's heart? A bilateral incision on the upper left region of the sternum.

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If you're happy and you know it go to hell.

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What did Batman say to Robin before they got in the batmobile? Get in the batmobile.

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i ate and i ate and i was sick on the floor 8x8=64

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What happens when a rabbit is late for a very important date? Nothing, rabbits have no logical way to keep track of time.

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Why do Chinese people have flat faces? Air bags.

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A woodchuck could chuck wood but a woodchuck couldn't chuck Norris because Norris isn't a type of wood.

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You ask a German how long it takes to go from Berlin to Amsterdam. He replies, ''About four hours by tank."

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Why did the man follow the law? He didn't want to get arrested

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What is another way to call a procrastinator? Avery annoyed and bored child who does not want to do her homework and is looking up many different anti-jokes for a laugh. You know who you are...

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What's the same between a school bus and a grape? They're both purple. Except for the bus.

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Knock knock Who's there? I eat myp.

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What dog keeps the best time? All dogs will keep reasonably good time as far as their care is concerned, if they have a stable home routine.

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Two men walk into a bar. You think the second man would have seen it.

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Q: Why don't people like me? A: Because I smell bad and I give off a creepy vibe

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Whats Yellow and has arms. A lemon i lied about the arms.

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Hey guys wanna here a joke? Never mind it was a gay joke but f**k it.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops