How do you make a Jew cry? You kill all of their friends and family members.

What's long and hard? The Ap European exam that i just took.

What's black and white and red all over. Half a zebra

Why did the hot blonde strip down? So she can take a shower

Knock knock! Who's there? Luke. Luke who? Leukemia.

What did the Nazi put into the oven? Bread.

Who killed the ears of every human being? -Rebecca Black

A police officer stops a blonde for speeding and asks her very nicely if he could see her license. She replied in a huff, "I wish you guys could get your act together. Just yesterday you take away my license and then today you expect me to show it to you."

Penis

How do you make sushi if you are a fish? Commit suicide and sell yourelf to a sushi resturant!

Whats worse than finding a real joke on anti-jokes? -Nothing

A man walks into a bar, he has a terrible drinking problem and he is ruining his family.

Why didn't the skeleton go to the dance? Because it is the decaying remains of a corpse and therefore lacks brain and muscle tissue depriving it of the ability of though and movement both of which are key skills in the art of dancing.

Yo mamas so fat.

Why was the boy crying? Because he had previously driven over innocent civilians who were all constipated and had now caused a mild to extremely large shitstorm.

Xbox One

Why did the boy not turn in his homework? Because his pet ate it.

- What's the difference between a squirrel? - It can neither fly.

Man 1: Nock-nock Man 2: Please leave my place of residence

What's the difference between a fine wine and a dead baby in a blender? One gets better as it ages, and the other is a horrific accident.

What do you call a black priest? Someone devoted to the word of god

What's neon green and has 69 legs? Nothing that I know of, but it would be an interesting creature

A duck walks up to a lemonade stand. He orders a lemonade and leaves promptly

How many light bulbs does it take to screw a blonde? 3.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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