What does Harry Potter love? Magic

kkk

you: "hey, is your refrigerater running?" random, confusded individual: "yeah" you: "oh."

A boy was crying. He had been abused and beaten by his parents, and thrown in his room. He was devastated, and wanted to kill himself. He tossed and turned in bed, and moaned himself to sleep. When he awoke, he felt a chill up his spine, noticing that all of his blankets had been torn off of his bed, leaving only him and his mattress. He open the window, and jumped out of his three story building. Luckily, his bedroom was on the first floor. He ran away, and found a rich family that loved him so much until a week later, a murderer came and killed everyone, including him.

A lady forgot to feed her goat. When she went to feed it, It wasn't there. Why? She didn't have a goat. Another lady forgot to feed her cat. When she went to feed it, it wasn't there. Why? It died 2 days earlier. A man forgot to feed his cow. When he went to go feed it, it wasn't there. Why? They had ate it for dinner last night. A teenage boy forgot to feed his hamster. When he went to feed it, it wasn't there. Why? He spent so much time playing video games that it ate itself. So the boy had his mom make him a sandwich.

Why are all of the cars in the left lane? Because you are in Winona MN.

Why do girls not have to have drivers license? Because they don't need a car to get from the bedroom to the kitchen ;) Don't mean to offend anybody! His joke is just funny

whats the difference between you're mom and you're dad none there both the same

Why did the child cry? It was beat up and thrown in a trashcan.

When I eat Mi Familia Mexica food, it burns when I go to the bathroom. Is that bad?

UNICORNZ R PURPUL

Why doesn't Santa Claus change his socks on Christmas Eve? Because he isn't real.

Chuck Norris was once approached by a woman for whom he had to fight a man to obtain all while doing a mundane activity in an unorthodox manner. He promptly declined for he is married and told the man he only fights for self-defense. He proceeded to put his pants on one leg at a time like everybody else.

Zombies eat brains! (You're safe)

I Stumbled this site and then read some antijokes, then I wrote a antijoke but I couldn't write a antijoke because their Terms of Service were down so then I lied to them saying I've read their Terms of Serivce and then I lied again, told them I were human, argued by saying "barnote plate" to them. They accepted.

see ya

Knock Knock. Whose there. We have a warrant for your arrest.

Do you know what african children do? They die of starvation.

What do you call a kid on crutches? Crippled

Why did the kid get out of school at twelve? He left early with a stomach ache

Dr Dr I think I have diarrhea You have irritable bowel syndrome, I recommend IBS support

You are walking down the street, and a man keeps on getting in your way. You want to politely... Screw it already and stab him in the back

Why did the litle boy's hat come off? cause he got hit by a train!

Whats worse than finding half of a worm in your apple? Noticing the apple is oversized and finding half of a dead baby.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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